When I was watching General Conference and the Korean children’s choir started singing “I Love to see the Temple” in a language I did not understand, something amazing hit me.
I don’t know why this thought was spurred by this song from these children.
That feeling was this-
I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ.
How blessed I am to not only be on this earth at a time when His church exists, but to be a member of that Church. Jesus Christ’s Church. His Church!
As I listened to words I didn’t understand but music I could never misplace, and as the spirit filled me and tears filled my eyes, I realized something.
If I lived during a time when the Church of Jesus Christ did not exist on the earth, I would have forever lived my mortal existence with a hole in my spirit and my experience. It occurred to me that if I lived in any other dispensation, I would have felt a distinct emptiness within me. Maybe this realization happened at that moment because at that particular moment, I was so filled to the brim with a spiritual feeling that I’ve come to rely upon so heavily.
What a challenge it would have been to live in a world without the Gospel of Jesus Christ in its fullness.
We live in a difficult and challenging world. But amidst that challenge I am a 30-minute drive from 3 different temples.
How blessed I am.
I am so grateful to live today, with the restored Gospel of Jesus Christ fully present, and His Church in full force.
What would I have done without it?
Maybe God knew I could not endure that emptiness. Maybe that’s why I’m here at this moment.
For whatever reason I am here now, today, I am grateful for it. Grateful beyond measure.
My favorite calling I’ve ever had was Ward Mission Leader. For those who don’t know, I basically helped the full-time missionaries for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in any way I could. Getting to be around missionaries has been one of the greatest blessings in my life. There’s something powerful about being around young men and women that have sacrificed two years in the prime of their life to serve and share about Jesus Christ.
I’ve always loved stories of faith; stories of miracles that occur when full faith and devotion is given to something important. I want to share one of my favorite stories from my time as Ward Mission Leader.
Missionaries do a lot of amazing things; a lot more than just baptize. Simply teaching others about Christ is important. Serving and loving others is important. Being a representative of Jesus Christ is important.
That said, the reason missionaries devote two full years to a mission is the hope to share with someone the good news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, have it touch that person’s heart, see that person change their life for Christ, and ultimately that person making the decision to be baptized. Like I said, many amazing things can happen before a baptism. But, the decision to be baptized and the blessings that come after are the ultimate goal.
It was for that reason that I decided to set a high bar on a goal as my time as Ward Mission Leader was coming to an end. I was marrying Beth on 6/1/19. At that point I would change wards, the building and group I’d been going to since returning to church, and no longer have the calling of Ward Mission Leader. My greatest hope was that the missionary efforts we had developed as a ward could be continued after I left.
I set a goal in May for there to be three baptisms in the ward in the month of June. For some perspective, in the previous year our ward had two baptisms.
I started fasting and praying. I announced in a stake missionary correlation meeting that the Scottsdale YSA Ward would have 3 baptisms in June.
“That’s awesome! You have three people on date to be baptized?” I was asked.
My response, “No, we don’t have anybody on date.”
The goal was set nonetheless. I had faith that if the missionaries and myself fasted and prayed our hearts out, and did our part, a miracle would happen.
As the month of May progressed things started happening. There were some individuals the missionaries had been meeting with and teaching about the restored Gospel of Jesus Christ. There were two in particular that had been meeting with the missionaries regularly.
As we continued to pray with this singular focus in our hearts, one of those individuals committed to being baptized on 6/29. This was amazing!
There was a second person who wanted to be baptized but there was something getting in the way. It was a frustration of mine at the time because that person was worthy to be baptized but a technical requirement wasn’t met. Her living situation caused a problem. Again, fully worthy, but unable to get baptized until her living situation was changed.
On 5/25 it was time to call in faith reinforcements. Up to that point it had been the missionaries, Beth, a couple others, and myself committing our faith to this goal.
I wrote this as a reminder for myself on 5/25:
“I sent a text to ward missionary committee asking them to join fast for miracle three baptisms in June. It was kind of hard to send the text. There were moments that I wondered if I should send it and if sending it was right, if I was saying the right thing. I ended up being somewhat bold saying, “The missionaries and a few of us have been praying for something very specific: 3 individuals to be baptized into the Scottsdale ward in June. There’s a lot of faith in this as when we started there wasn’t a single person on date to be baptized. There is now one person who plans to be baptized on June 29th. The missionaries and I are going to fast and pray for these three individuals to be led to us and for our ward to act when the opportunity comes. I invite each of you, if you’d like, to join us in fasting and praying for this tomorrow. I know that there are three people out there that need the gospel of Jesus Christ and are ready to be baptized. With faith, God will lead these people to us if we are ready to act, and if it’s His will and His plan. Thanks everybody! Love each of you.” Four minutes after sending the text, the missionaries texted me and said that the individual whose living situation was in the way had that issue resolved and just set their date to be baptized for June 8th. So much joy.
What was hard about sending that text was I wasn’t sure if what I was asking for was right. I always wanted to ask things of God only if it was His will. While I know God’s children coming closer to Him is His greatest joy, I worried that my intentions weren’t perfectly aligned with his. That was the doubt that came before I sent the text. I decided to send the text because I wanted to faith away my doubts. That is why I was bold. That is why the immediate text from the missionaries brought me instantly to the most profound joy, followed by tears.
It was a miracle.
I won’t go into details about how the miracle for this person took place. What I will say is this. It was a major frustration for me for some time that this person couldn’t be baptized despite having a sincere desire to do so, and being worthy to do so. A sequence of events took place that led to there being no issue with the baptism taking place. I was so grateful that a worthy individual could enter the waters of baptism and align themselves with Jesus Christ.
Another note to myself that I wrote that day so I wouldn’t forget:
Thinking back on (the issue), I was pretty worked up about it but somehow just moved on. I came to a feeling of peace about it that I didn’t even know was happening. But then it worked itself out, or God worked it out, and I look back and realize He spoke peace to my soul. I can almost hear Him, “Peace, my son. Don’t you know my hand is in these things? Don’t you know I will care for my children? Have faith.”
For those anticipating the miracle third baptism in June- it didn’t happen. In fact, the second one was delayed to July 13th. I think that’s wonderful. I think of it as God’s way of reminding me that my faith is far from perfect. I set an arbitrary goal of June and to keep me humble He had the second baptism occur in July and the third didn’t happen. I’m far from truly aligned with His will. We’re far from being able to work all miracles. But God does watch. He does hear. He does care. In that ward, we had two baptisms the previous 12 months. In the 35 days after I left my favorite calling ever, the ward that saved my life, baptized two new members.
One of those members was recently sealed in the temple.
The first person I had the pleasure of seeing baptized into the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints while I was Ward Mission Leader got married in the temple 5 months after his baptism.
Casper’s Baptism
Beth and I had the greatest pleasure of hosting 3 former missionaries in our home so we could all go to the wedding together. I remember sitting in the temple, waiting for the sealing. Waiting for Casper and Ashlee, two people that had greatly impacted and strengthened my faith, to be sealed to each other for time and all eternity. I was sitting and thinking.
Elder Dotson, one of the missionaries who had the honor of teaching Casper the Gospel, came and sat by me. He told me, “This is why we baptize people. Baptisms and endowments and all the covenants made are important. But this is what it’s all about. Two people getting sealed in the temple. Starting a family that will be together for eternity. This is why we do what we do. This is what it’s all about.”
I wish everyone could know the joy I’ve felt helping someone find what I’ve found. I wish I could share the joy of seeing two people sealed together for eternity. A love never to be separated. It’s the great plan of our loving Heavenly Father and what we’re here to do. Develop faith. Obtain and nurture an eternal family. Return to Him.
I’m so grateful for His Plan and the small part I get to play in it. There is no greater joy.
These things are all amazing. These are all fruits of the gospel.
But.
Why are they amazing?
After seeing a great vision of eternity, of all the heavens, of the glory, love, and light we will all receive in the next life, after this vision, Joseph Smith and Sydney Rigdon wrote this:
“And now, after the many testimonies which have been given of him, this is the testimony, last of all, which we give of him: That he lives!
For we saw him, even on the right hand of God; and we heard the voice bearing record that he is the Only Begotten of the Father.” (Doctrine and Covenants 76:22)
How I wish I could scream this to the world. Jesus Christ lives! He died for you, for each of us. He died so you need not fear death, trials, or tribulations. You needn’t fear anything. He died for your reassurance. He died for your comfort. He died for your sins. He died for you.
All those things mentioned at the start are amazing, glorious, and wonderful because they point to one thing: Him. Jesus Christ. The Savior of the world. Without Him all of it would be for nothing. Temples, prophets, scripture, what good are they? They are only good for what they point us to. The light and love of this world. Jesus Christ.
I wish the world could see this. I wish the world could see that all these things are just tools pointing to someone far greater.
Ultimately the gospel of Jesus Christ brings comfort. The Plan of Salvation brings peace. The Plan of Happiness makes this life a joy. How could this life be anything less when you know the bigger picture?
I don’t fear trials because I know they help me grow.
I don’t fear tribulations because I know they benefit me for eternity.
I don’t fear death because I know where I’m going if I continue to look to Christ.
I wrote this months ago. Now I’m coming off a situation that has been a trial and tribulation. I believe I can say with a little more confidence today that I don’t fear death.
It can be naïve to say I welcome trials and tribulations when life is wonderful and peaceful. I appreciate that my life is wonderful and peaceful because of the Gospel and the peace it preemptively brings me before trials. It’s easy to say these things when everything is going well. I’m glad I can say them when things are hard as well.
Despite current challenges, I feel so blessed.
Of course, I don’t want tests and trials, but I know when they come, they are for a great purpose. I hope when opportunities come for my faith to be tested it can feel like an open book test. I hope I can face trials in life as if I have the answers, which I believe I do. It’s easy to say until a true tragedy hits my life. I don’t hope for a true tragedy, but I hope for the strength and faith to endure tragedy if it comes.
Coming off the accident I had, I still don’t feel like I’ve gone through a tremendous trial. It has been challenging, but not overly. I don’t feel like it has been that difficult at all. I don’t know how much of that is the fact that the challenge wasn’t actually difficult or due to all the support I have around me, especially the support of God.
These are all the benefits of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I wish the world had this same peace I have been profoundly blessed to be given.
The first 48 hours, it turns out, is not just a homicide drama on television or the most important time after a homicide, it’s also an important time after the birth of a newborn.
The first 24 hours in the hospital went amazing. There’s no better word than amazing. Ivy slept the whole time. Beth would have to wake her to eat. She would eat and immediately go back to sleep. We were warned of the calm before the storm.
Nurses would come in and do this test or that. She cried once when I was holding her for like 5 seconds. She didn’t cry at all during her first bath. She looked like she was enjoying a spa day.
When another nurse pricked her foot for blood I asked if babies usually cried during that. She said, “well, I gave her sugar water.” I don’t know what that means but maybe we should be keeping sugar water on hand. What I do know is there was no crying while at the hospital after her initial couple hours coming into the world.
We brought her home around 4:30pm 12/5/20. Becky (mother-in-law) and Jane (new aunt) were at the condo. Apparently Bengie was disturbed by how we left the previous morning. He had been acting strange while we were away and licked us even crazier than usual when we got home. He didn’t seem to notice the new addition. Yet.
Becky made dinner. Jane held Ivy. Keith (father-in law) came over after his shift at the hospital. Everyone expressed joy at a newborn.
The first night was interesting. While I think she was still pretty well behaved, it’s crazy how small interruptions to sleep can be completely disorienting.
We went to sleep around midnight. Mistake number one. I’ve been told this by many people, but I think I’ll have to learn firsthand. Really – take sleep whenever it’s available. Ivy and I were watching ASU football until 11:30pm. Beth fed her and put her down to sleep around that time.
At 2:00am Ivy started crying. I’ll do my best to replay the events of the night, but Beth and I had great difficulty piecing events together in the morning.
I believe Beth tried to feed her, but she wasn’t really eating. Cluster-feeding? I don’t know.
*Beth update when reading this – she did feed her before I woke up at 2:00am, we think?
Things that happened, order unknown:
Beth made a bottle. Beth passed a blood clot. She was upset and scared and talked to her mom. Determined it was ok unless other symptoms/things happened. Beth was upset and having a hard time. I swapped spots with her and laid by Ivy’s bed, which for the first couple months (I think?) will be lying next to our bed. I fed Ivy half of the bottle Beth prepared.
Ivy was somewhat fussy and always on the verge of crying. Between 2am and 4am I realized she had a very messy diaper. Explained the fussy. I changed Ivy in the other room and laid her back down in her bed. She was much better. I’m not sure if Beth was completely sleeping during this time. I think she was kind of in and out of it. She was exhausted.
I laid with my hand on Ivy or helping to keep her pacifier in which seemed to settle her down. I think I slept around 4am. Again, not sure how things transpired, but at some point I woke up because Ivy was fussing. Looked like she was hungry. I talked to Beth around 5am (maybe?) about Ivy being hungry. I think at some point Beth turned the hot air on in the room. It had gotten cold in the room. I could have sworn I passed Ivy to Beth around 5am to feed but in the morning neither of us could recall if that actually happened. Funny, but being serious.
At some point I was really hot, and Ivy was fine. She was sleeping like a, you guessed it, baby. Really, she was sleeping well. Interesting we use that phrase to indicate deep sleep when in reality sleeping like a baby is more like up every 90 minutes wanting some attention. The living room was cooler, so I curled up on the couch and slept there. Again, at some point (8am?) I woke up to the loud carbon monoxide alarm. It beeped loud, 3 times. I saw Beth coming from the kitchen. I couldn’t fathom why she would make 3 loud beeps happen. She seemed in a haze. She ignored the loud beeping. That confused me more. I learned Bengie was sleeping on my legs. His number one fear is loud beeps. He jumped and ran to the bedroom, under the bed, tried to jump on the bed but Ivy’s bassinette was in the way. He ran back and jumped on me. He repeated this 3 times. I held and pet him and he was shaking like crazy. When I stopped petting, he ran to the bedroom, found his way onto the bed, and burrowed into the blankets.
The new addition was proving to be a major interruption to his routine, peace, and quiet.
**Beth addition number two – “you must have been in a haze too, when the beep went off, I yelled ‘oh –.’” (followed by a bad word).
I am not denying any sort of hazy phase. I was a cloud of confusion.
I guess the morning had started.
Ivy was peaceful as could be, as far as I could tell. She’s been an angel ever since. While writing this she was curled up on my legs/lap in front of me. Already learning to multi-task. Her pacifier just fell out. She likes her pacifier.
I still got to meditate that first day. That was big.
Becky came by and made some food. I decided to fast in gratitude to Heavenly Father for all this.
Beth proofread this and told me to insert “I was a Rockstar” talking about myself. That’s a bit much. Beth’s done all the hard work and is completely exhausted. I’ve gotten to sleep next to Ivy and take care of the most important person in the world. And she’s so cute. And when I sleep, I get to put my hand on her and be with her.
Good deal. I’ll take it.
Ivy may be the “Coo Monster.” She’s constantly coo-ing. It’s heart-melting. The cutest little hums and noises. I love her very much. It’s amazing how much I like caring for her. It’s crazy how exhausted I can be already and yet how happy.
Ivy went on a short walk in her stroller today.
She loves her swing.
She loves if I gently tickle her head or face with my fingers. Her eyes will instantly flutter closed.
Sometimes I look at my dog and think, “he wouldn’t last 5 minutes out in the real world.” If he had to go out and hunt/scavenge for food and water, on his own, no chance. Being cute getting someone to give him food and water would be his only chance at survival. If that option is removed, he’s a goner.
Look at this picture. It looks like he just ate a plate of strawberries and his afternoon plans are to lounge and get belly rubs.
Exhibit A
Granted, he is an 8-pound poodle/terrier mix. He wasn’t bred to survive in the wild. He was bred to be cute and to get people to give him stuff. I’m just saying, removing that option = goner.
I can already hear the “big” dog owners. “My dog would survive in the wild. Yours is closer to a cat, mine still has some wolf instincts.” OK. Your golden retriever is not surviving a week in the wild without its cute factor, just the same as my poodle/terrier.
Exhibit B
My dog lives the most cushy life imaginable. He sleeps all the time. He wakes up and eats. He sleeps some more. He goes on walks. Then he sleeps. He plays. He goes on bike rides. At 9:30pm he stares me dead in the eyes and I know he’s saying, “You know good and well it’s time for bed.”
It wasn’t until just recently that a very obvious and humbling fact slapped me right across the face. I wouldn’t survive a week out in the wild.
I was looking at my (adorable) little dog curled up on the bed, petting his soft hair, admiring how good he is, being jealous of how easy his life is, when I had that thought. “You poor pathetic creature. What would you do without me?”
Who was I talking to?
*Slap to the face.
What would I do out in the wild?
Here I was in my air-conditioned condo, with a giant Hydrapeak water bottle filled to the brim with ice cold water that I filled from my refrigerator. That morning I’d poured Berry Colossal Crunch into a bowl, pulled a cold jug of milk from the refrigerator, and had cereal, like a proper grown man should do. That morning I’d taken a piping hot shower. I let the water run long enough so that it was plenty warm. Cold shower? No chance! Running water came from a tap where I put a toothbrush I’d squeezed mint toothpaste onto to brush my teeth. I then sat in a comfortable chair and worked at a computer.
Who was I to judge my dog? I was living the same life my dog was!
Put me out in the wild without food and water and tell me to figure it out. Remove the option of me going to someone’s door and saying, “please feed me,” and I had no chance.
I don’t think we take the time often enough to
Stop and realize how blessed we are.
Realize how pathetic we are.
What would I do out in the wild without a can opener? Let alone having to hunt and find food?
I’ve recently read a couple books about the old west. A story I just read was about an 11-year-old boy who ran off with some Shoshone Indians (Native Americans). He lived two years with them. Eating buffalo meat. Hunting rabbits. Fishing for trout. I was amazed at the life this boy lived just 170 years ago.
Can you imagine if your ancestors could look at you now? What a pathetic sight you would be. Your great-great-great-great grandpa would marvel at your fancy light up information device and cans of food but would ask you, do you know how to hunt? Do you know how to guide yourself by the stars? Do you know how to survive without your pre-packaged meals and Uber eats? (Reminder- that great grandfather would be so perplexed by Uber eats).
Can you imagine your great-great-great-great grandmother asking where you keep the chickens? How do you grind the wheat for your bread? (Do you grind wheat for bread??? I DON’T KNOW!) Can you even cook without that radiation device that nuclearizes your food into something *edible?
While modern advances are amazing, truly amazing; we have become so pathetic.
That’s all.
Just thought I would remind all of us of that.
Next time you look at your house cat, little dog, big dog, or even your fish and scoff and say “you dumb and spoiled animal,” I hope you pause for a second and soak in the irony.
No Coincidences 