No Coincidences

Tag: faith

  • Love is Powerful

    Love is Powerful

    I was once asked a question I surprisingly had never truly dived into.  What was different about the first time I met with the bishop when coming back to church?   Why did I come back?

    I’ve written about some of the coincidences leading to me getting to the Bishop’s office and ultimately coming back to church.  But how did I stay?  Coming back once, for a fleeting moment of revival, that’s easy.  What really brought me back?

    I wrote in The Inspiration about cancelling that first appointment with the bishop.  That appointment eventually got rescheduled. 

    I remember walking into Bishop Thurston’s office.  It was a small room, like most bishop’s offices.  I believe there was a picture of the First Presidency, and Christ.  At other points in my life both pictures might have made me feel uncomfortable, unworthy, judged.  Maybe not the picture of Christ.  His image has always brought me warmth, if not alongside guilt.

    First Presidency February 2008 – January  2018

    I remember being so nervous.  What were we going to talk about?  It had been almost 10 years since I sat in a bishop’s office.  Was he going to grill me?  Was I going to have to confess all my sins?  Was this going to be a moment I looked back on in disgust?  Was he going to judge me?  Was he going to wonder what brought this messed up individual into his office?

    And then he smiled.  He shook my hand.

    If you’ve seen the smile of Kody Thurston, you know it.  If you’ve seen the smile of a loving bishop anywhere in this world, you know this smile.  They’re the same anywhere.

    He asked me to sit and I believe he offered the prayer.  Then we started to talk.  I remember not knowing what to do with my hands, I was fiddling with them in my lap.  I remember looking down a lot.  Every time I looked up he would be looking right at me.

    We talked about where I’d been, where I was going, my family.  We got to know each other.  I don’t remember much about the exact conversation.  I do remember what I didn’t feel, judged.

    Then he asked the question, I think it was, “Do you have anything you need to talk about?”  It was a loaded question, but it didn’t feel like it.  I knew if I said no he would move on.

    I had come into that room with zero intention of confessing my sins and opening my heart to a stranger.  Then this strange thing happens in a room with a person who has been sent and commissioned by Jesus Christ for this very purpose.  There’s a feeling in a room when the spirit is there.  It’s overwhelming.  I didn’t say much.  I implied some things; I got some things off my chest.  He didn’t ask much.  He moved forward.  That’s what I remember.  Moving forward.

    I talk about no coincidences.  I know it wasn’t a coincidence that I came back at that time.  Maybe it’s an excuse for me taking so long, but I know that God knew who and what I needed when I came back.  I firmly believe that God waited until I was ready and put Bishop Thurston in a position to be there when I was ready.  I don’t think I would have made it without him.

    When I was getting ready to leave, he said he wanted to see me again soon, within the week.  He told me to reach out to his assistant and schedule it soon.  He told me to tell his assistant to make it happen in the next week no matter what, even if I had to come to his house.  That’s another thing I’ll never forget.  Come to his house?  Why did this stranger want to see me again so soon?

    I was once asked what made me come back?  Love.  Love made me come back.  I knew when I left that office, without a shadow of a doubt, that the stranger I just met cared about me so deeply.  Is that something I could know?  I guess not, I couldn’t know it.  He could have been faking it.  The reason it has stuck with me, and the reason I came back, is because it wasn’t something I knew, it was something I felt. Like testimony or faith, it was something I couldn’t deny and something I’ll never forget.  At the end of that meeting I felt like I’d just met somebody who would do anything in his power, anything he possibly could, to help me.  I felt the love of Jesus Christ for me, displayed through this stranger so potently, with such power. 

    I left that office feeling good.  I’ll admit something.  I tried to keep it together.  I really tried.  I drove away from the building.  I pulled over within a minute.  I cried and I cried.  It was like the love I wouldn’t allow myself to feel Christ giving me for so long poured over me with such intensity.  I cry today thinking about it.

    Those first few weeks coming back were really hard.  Really, really hard.  When it got to feel like too much to continue on that path, like I couldn’t do it, I thought about the love I felt that day. I thought about that little bishop’s office where I felt something, and my heart changed.  I thought about the moment in my car after.  I realized I never wanted to be without that love, ever again.  That’s what brought me back and kept me coming back.

    Love is powerful.

  • Policy

    Policy

    I want to write about what I learned when I struggled with something at church.  I apologize for not going into specifics because I don’t want that to be the point.  I want to write about what I learned from my struggle.  To be clear, it was not a faith crisis.  It was a policy/decision that I struggled with.  I think almost all of us can relate to this for some topic, to some extent. 

    The first thing I learned is that God will speak peace to us, if we need it and if we can accept it.  In my case I was questioning something and asking myself, “was that right?”  I was pretty worked up about it.  I was upset and confused.  At some point, I stopped thinking about it.  At the time I didn’t realize what was happening.  I somehow moved on.  I came to a feeling of peace about it. Initially, I attributed it to my general lack of caring about things I can’t control.  But then it worked itself out, or God worked it out, and I look back and realize He spoke peace to me.  I can almost hear Him, “Peace, my son.  Don’t you know my hand is in these things?  Don’t you know I will care for my children?  Have faith.”

    I believe God blessed and helped me.  I believe the Holy Ghost spoke peace to my soul.  I didn’t ask for it.  I didn’t even question it.  Maybe I showed a fraction of faith and God rewarded me with peace.  I more think He loves me and gave me that peace because I needed it.  Either way it became a non-issue for me.  Things would work out. 

    But, no matter our faults or potential mistakes, God will make things happen the way they need to happen.

    I learned an important lesson.  Despite how I think things should go or how I think things should be done, God has an order to His church.  Decisions are made by those in authority.  End of story.  Satan ended up where he was because he fought God’s authority.

    This gets me into the second thing I learned.

    Throughout history, there have been things that are hard for people to understand.  This has happened since before the restoration of the gospel.  For the entirety of human history, and especially Christ’s Church, there have been aspects of it that man couldn’t understand, comprehend, or sometimes accept.  We fall into this recency bias where we think we’re the only ones who struggle with church policy.  In Adam’s day, his children had issues with “church policy.”  In Moses’s day the Israelites disagreed with him often.  In Joseph Smith’s day and up to right now with Russell M. Nelson, there are policies that we don’t understand.  This isn’t unique to me.  This is constant throughout the history of man.

    In my opinion, it is okay to question.  The restoration started with a question.  We must be careful with doubt.  Doubt can be a part of faith; in fact, it is a part of faith.  If there weren’t some small part of doubt, it wouldn’t be faith.  It would be something known.  What we must be sure of is that our faith is stronger than our doubt.

    The third thing I’ve always known but have learned to truly appreciate is that our testimony must be based on something sure.  If our testimony is based on Jesus Christ and the Book of Mormon, it will all work out. 

    My testimony is built on something much bigger than any policy. 

    My testimony is built on Jesus Christ, Joseph Smith being a prophet of God, and the Book of Mormon being an inspired and true translation of an ancient book, given to us by God’s hand.  I know these things because I’ve prayed about them.  I know these things because I’ve felt them.  Some recent archaeological discovery is not going to dissuade me from the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon.  I won’t let some recent finding by society make me doubt things of God.

    I refuse to let my testimony of the important things be shaken by a policy. We must do our best not to get hung up on a moment.   I can’t fully comprehend eternity but I still try to put things into an eternal perspective. The bigger picture is that God guides this church.  It doesn’t mean our issues, doubts, and questions will be resolved today, next week, next month, or even in this life.  But it will get resolved.  I know that.  And if you’re experiencing a faith crisis I would suggest praying.  Don’t always ask for your question to get answered or for it to be “resolved” by your definition.  Ask for peace.  And then be willing to accept that peace and move on.  That’s important.  You will receive peace.  But if you dwell and dwell and dwell on the doubt the peace will leave, Satan will win back his portion.  Have faith that your question will be answered at some point and move forward.  I know that’s easier said than done in many instances. 

    There are so many things I don’t understand.  Faith comes with the hope that I’ll one day understand. 

    I think that’s the lesson to take from this.  God is watching.  He loves us.  Things will work the way they need to.  When we get ourselves worked up, worried, concerned, frustrated, even angry, He can speak peace to our souls if we seek it.  He can speak peace to our souls even if we don’t know how desperately we need it. 

    I’ll end with a quote I heard from a recent meditation:

    “If we can accept that life has changed even though it’s hard, if we can surrender to the fact that all we can do is move on then we won’t experience the same level of stress we would have had we resisted our circumstances.  And if we can remind ourselves that this pain we’re feeling will change, that it will soften… we’ll heal and feel joy again much sooner.  So, in times when there’s nothing that we can do to change our circumstances, in times we feel stressed and uncertain and overwhelmed, the most kind and compassionate thing we can do for ourselves is to surrender to what is.”

    I would add, surrender to God.  If we surrender to Him, He will take care of us.

  • Worldwide Fast

    Prophet and President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Russell M. Nelson, asked the world to fast on Good Friday, April 10, 2020.  His invitation:

    “I invite all, including those not of our faith, to fast and pray on Good Friday, April 10, that the present pandemic may be controlled, caregivers protected, the economy strengthened, and life normalized.”

    Russell M. Nelson

    I was a member of a group on Facebook for the Worldwide Fast.  Last I checked, that group had over 537,000 people! Click Here To See the Group

    This group turned into a worldwide testimony session.  There were so many amazing posts.  I spent the entire morning after Good Friday reading them.  There were two that I really loved.  I asked permission from the original posters to share their stories.  I hope my friends and family (those who didn’t already see these) enjoy them as much as I did.

    The first was about a young boy: 

    My 7 year old nephew wanted to be part of today’s fasting and prayer. He loves to eat, so this was a true sacrifice for him. He’s been very prayerful all day. His mom found him praying in the yard. When she told him she was proud of him, he responded “Sometimes we just need to find our own sacred grove.” Isn’t that true?!?! The pure faith of a young man has served as an example and blessing to the world many times throughout history. I pray that the faith of this little boy and all the world fasting and praying together today result in modern day miracles.

    Many of the posts were about children and they were some of the most touching.  This is a reminder that we must “become as little children.” (Matthew 18:3)

    The second post said:

    I could not join the first global fast on March 29th. I was battling with COVID-19, fighting to stay alive. During this difficult time, I received a promise from my Heavenly Father: “These tribulations shall be but a small moment. But WHEN you are healed, testify to the world of the God of mercy”. I recovered through the fasting and prayers of others by God’s grace and mercy. Tomorrow, It is my turn to give back and to join this fast for all those who are facing this tough battle around the world so they may be blessed like I have been. I love Christ’s comforting words:
    These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
    May God bless us all!

    I am so grateful for these two powerful testimonies and I’m so thankful they shared them.

    I hope as a world we don’t soon forget this.  As things do return to normal, I hope we don’t immediately turn back to our old ways.  I hope we can learn, grow, love, and rely on God more than ever.

    Isaiah 40:31 reads:

    “But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.”

    A friend posted something that I think is important to remember. He pointed out that the footnote for wait says “to hope for or anticipate.”  Let’s remember things won’t change overnight.  But as we continue in faith, Christ will pour out his spirit on us and the world can change. Finally, how grateful I am for a prophet that can lead a worldwide initiative of faith.  This affirms my testimony that he is a Prophet of God and he leads God’s church.  All are welcome to follow.

    We Thank Thee, O God, for a Prophet

  • Faith

    It’s a topic I will spend my life studying and trying to understand.  This will likely not be the only time I write about faith.  It is something so dear to me, my faith.  I keep coming back to this topic even though I’ve struggled to put together a stimulating thought on the subject.

    Great quotes come to mind, even some just from this last General Conference: 

    “Faith is the antidote for fear.” 

    Ricardo P. Gimenez

    Faith must be based on truth and eternity. 

    “Faith is the power by which God created the universe.” 

    Hebrews 11:3

    I’ve spent a large part of the last couple years contemplating faith.  What makes it so easy to find for some and so hard for others?  What makes some so sure God is there and others so skeptical?  Is it our nature?  Is it something inside of us?  Is it a simple characteristic difference between persons like blonde, brown, or red hair?  Are we already born with little or a lot of faith?  That doesn’t seem quite right.

    It makes me think of a quote I read recently.  It was in Book 1 of Theophilus of Antioch to Autolycus.  The early writings of a Christian Bishop to a Pagan:

    “Do you not know that faith is the leading principle in all matters? For what husbandman can reap, unless he first trust his seed to the earth? Or who can cross the sea, unless he first entrust himself to the boat and the pilot? And what sick person can be healed, unless first he trust himself to the care of the physician? And what art or knowledge can any one learn, unless he first apply and entrust himself to the teacher? If, then, the husbandman trusts the earth, and the sailor the boat, and the sick the physician, will you not place confidence in God, even when you hold so many pledges at His hand?”

    Theophilus of Antioch
    Mustard Seed

    I once had a discussion with my grandpa about the Book of Mormon.  We discussed the gold plates that Joseph Smith discovered.  Those plates were taken to heaven and were only ever seen by 11 witnesses plus Joseph Smith himself.  Here is a paraphrased version of the conversation with my grandpa:

    “Why do you think the plates weren’t left here for us to see?  Wouldn’t it help so many to physically see them?  Then everyone would believe.”

    His response, “In my experience, even if the plates were right in front of some people, they would still deny.  Why do you think they were taken away?”

    “Well, probably to protect some, for that reason you said.  Some would see them and still deny.  Also, they may have been too sacred to keep on earth.  They may have been mistreated or lost if they stayed here.”

    Then he said something I’ve always remembered. 
    He said,

    “I think there was a much more important reason.  One of the most important things we’re on this earth to develop is faith.  If you saw the plates, there would be no faith involved.  You would know.  And yet, there’s always some measure of faith involved.  As I said, even some looking and touching them may still deny and explain it away as a fanciful story.  But, here’s the important part – because you have never touched them, seen them in anyway, because you had to read the words and feel it in your soul and heart, your testimony is stronger.  Because you never saw them, it involves faith. But could you know with more of a surety they were true if I were holding them in front of you right now?”

    “No,” I replied.

    “Exactly.  Your testimony of them is not based on physical touch or sight.  You’ve felt the words deep in your soul.  That’s more than your eyes can ever give you.  That’s what we’re here to develop.  Faith.”

    Those words have always stuck with me and always will.  I will have so much more to say on this topic as I continue to write.  My message to everyone I love, whether part of my religion or not:  Have faith.  Acknowledge the hand of God in your every day.  To continue off what Theophilus said above, you get a job and then you have faith you will get paid.  You eat food and you have faith it will help your body keep moving.  You wake up and have faith your legs will carry you to where you want to go.  Understand that you live your life by faith and develop it even more.

    Mustard Seed Growing

    One last famous quote by Thomas Aquinas:

    “To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible.”

    Faith – Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square