Tag: families forever

What is a Place?

Prepare for one of my more “out there” posts. You’ve been warned. Here we go.

I often hear statements like, “When we die, we may not be in the same place as our family but…”

For those who don’t know the doctrines of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on the kingdoms of heaven, this will be something I’ll likely write about another time. In the meantime, read this link.

We know that here on earth, time is much different than in heaven. In the afterlife, time will be a completely different concept. Our understanding of time is completely impacted by our mortal experience. There’s a good chance in the next life there will be no “time.” This is a difficult concept to wrap our mortal brains around, but I believe it to be true.

I think the next life might have a similar application for “place.” Here on earth, we have such a finite understanding of “places.” You’re here or you’re there. Then how can God be everywhere?

I wonder if our understanding of “place” will be much altered in the next existence, just like time. Space and time; I’m sure a quantum physicist can speak on this topic with much more eloquence.

The point I’m trying to make is, here on earth we get hung up on many things. Who will be married to who in heaven? Where will I be? What will I be doing? How will I spend my “time”? On and on our questions go. It’s natural for us to ask these questions. A constant topic of my writing is the wish that people would ask these questions more.

These questions are good, but here’s another one: what if the next existence is so out of our realm of understanding that these questions don’t even make sense?

Where will I be?

Where will my family be?

Back to that original statement I hear often: “I may not be in the same kingdom (place) as my relative, but I will still be able to see them.”

What if this is a wholly incorrect way of thinking about it? Yes, there will be kingdoms. What if this concept of kingdoms is a way for God to help us try to understand the next life? What if the kingdoms of heaven are analogous to our state of mind?

This applies, I think, to the Telestial Kingdom which we are told is as numerous as the stars. Will each person really have a star as their own “place?” I don’t know. Maybe. Maybe it’s a state of mind. The Telestial Kingdom could be our state of mind, our paradise, our new home – as numerous as the stars which are as numerous as different states of mind.

This state of mind idea also applies to visits and how those of a higher kingdom can visit those of a lower. Where will my family be and can I visit them? Do I want to be in the Celestial Kingdom if my family is in the Terrestrial Kingdom? If our “kingdom” is a state of mind or a state of consciousness, this explains how easily we could visit other “places.” Someone with a certain level of consciousness could easily visit, temporarily, a lower plain or consciousness to be with loved ones. But a lower state of consciousness can’t just raise its level to the higher “kingdom.” If they could, then they would join that kingdom.

I know. Now I’m in full matrix, take the red pill and raise your “consciousness” talk, but hear it out, read it again, consider it. Maybe there’s something there to ponder.

We know that only those who wish to obtain the highest glory will attain it. God will not force individuals to be “somewhere” “better” if they don’t want to be there. The greatest sinner doesn’t want to be in the presence of God. They would rather be outside of His presence than endure the glory that He is and feel how short they fall. The pain of being without God is less than being in front of Him and knowing what you could have been, and what you refused to be.

What if hell is a state of mind and being, not a place?

This thought came completely new to me from a (questionable) book called Ye Are Gods. But all books can open our minds or thinking or teach us something:

“Each degree of glory is merely a state of consciousness in the mind of each individual, from those who live in the filth of the gutters and the slums to those who travel a highway of light. Celestial glory is a state of consciousness or awareness and understanding. It is man’s heritage to look unto his Father and to claim his divine birthright.”

Hopefully I’m not being blasphemous here. I think this is an interesting thought experiment. I think this is a curious idea.

I need to ponder upon this more, but I believe I’m touching the iceberg of some truth here. This is not doctrine or anything church official I’ve read, just my thoughts. If you ever ask yourself these questions, I would love to hear yours.

September 21, 2023
Children Need Their Father

I went on a weeklong river rafting trip. I believe it was the longest time I’d spent away from Ivy. A large portion of that trip, I did not have my cell phone with me.

When I got off the river and started driving back to Las Vegas with my family, I checked my phone and learned that Ivy had not had a good week. Meltdowns, tantrums, refusing to sleep. Apparently, she’d had a very hard time in my absence. I didn’t even recognize the girl being described.

Many theories were tossed around to explain the behavior: teething, out of her routine (they stayed at my in-law’s house), she was sick, her shoes were too tight. I knew the truth. She missed her daddy. I couldn’t wait to get home and comfort her.

I’ve written about missing Ivy before. This was the first time, it seemed, she could really miss me. I just finished a book, What a Difference a Daddy Makes by Dr. Leman that talks all about the importance of a father, especially in a daughter’s life. It talks about how a father reinforces confidence and helps a daughter relate to men as she gets older. It talks about how moms have a tendency to parent and do things one way, and the balance of how a father generally does things is important to a child’s development. This is at least partly why The Family Proclamation says, “Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.”

I believe I was 16 when I first hung up on my mom while she was talking. I promptly received a call from my dad. The usual mild-mannered, relaxed father I knew was gone. I was told over the phone, in no uncertain terms, that if I EVER hung up on my mother ever again, he would kill me. I believed him. He told me I was to treat my mom with respect. It was an important lesson I needed to learn. It was the last time I ever hung up on my mom.

This is an example of why kids need their dad. Dads, in society, have gotten a ridiculously unfair reputation. Dr. Leman in the aforementioned book noted the unfair representation of fathers on television. Fathers are almost always bumbling blockheads that can’t get anything right. This is unfair and wrong. It has built a belief in society that fathers aren’t needed, or worse, that they cause more harm than good. Fathers are important.

So how was Ivy when I returned home? An angel. The most well-behaved, happy, sleeping babe you ever met. She smiled ear to ear the moment I saw her when I got home. It was such dramatic joy that I almost didn’t believe all the propaganda I’d been hearing about her. She just needed her daddy.

Before I could get too cocky, Beth had a doctor’s appointment during the week. It was Ivy and I for a couple hours. Then I got to witness all the behavior I’d seen.

A growing girl needs her daddy. She also needs her mother. We’ve seen that Ivy is way happier when it’s all of us together. Ivy’s still relatively fresh from heaven. She knows the importance of family and the The Family Proclamation.

I’m grateful to understand the importance of family. I’m grateful to have a small inkling of how important I can be to Ivy’s life. I’m grateful that Beth continues to be such a great mother. I’m grateful to have an amazing family to help me understand these things. I’m grateful that families can be forever.

July 14, 2022