When I was watching General Conference and the Korean children’s choir started singing “I Love to see the Temple” in a language I did not understand, something amazing hit me.
I don’t know why this thought was spurred by this song from these children.
That feeling was this-
I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ.
How blessed I am to not only be on this earth at a time when His church exists, but to be a member of that Church. Jesus Christ’s Church. His Church!
As I listened to words I didn’t understand but music I could never misplace, and as the spirit filled me and tears filled my eyes, I realized something.
If I lived during a time when the Church of Jesus Christ did not exist on the earth, I would have forever lived my mortal existence with a hole in my spirit and my experience. It occurred to me that if I lived in any other dispensation, I would have felt a distinct emptiness within me. Maybe this realization happened at that moment because at that particular moment, I was so filled to the brim with a spiritual feeling that I’ve come to rely upon so heavily.
What a challenge it would have been to live in a world without the Gospel of Jesus Christ in its fullness.
We live in a difficult and challenging world. But amidst that challenge I am a 30-minute drive from 3 different temples.
How blessed I am.
I am so grateful to live today, with the restored Gospel of Jesus Christ fully present, and His Church in full force.
What would I have done without it?
Maybe God knew I could not endure that emptiness. Maybe that’s why I’m here at this moment.
For whatever reason I am here now, today, I am grateful for it. Grateful beyond measure.
I recently had the special opportunity to bless Ivy. Leading up to the blessing, I did some research on the history of blessing children in the Church of Jesus Christ and its significance. For Ivy’s blessing, Beth put together an event and a description of what a baby blessing is. Here is that description:
What is a baby blessing?
In summary, the naming and blessing of children is a commandment of God. It is proper for a worthy father to name and bless his children. Blessing of children was done during the time of Christ, and it occurred in the early years of the restored Church. The ordinance has become a regular practice followed by Church members ever since.
Who has the authority to bless a baby?
A worthy priesthood holder under the direction of the local bishop. It is usually the father or a close family member.
What is the priesthood?
The word priesthood has two meanings. First, priesthood is the power and authority of God. It has always existed and will continue to exist without end. Through the priesthood, God created and governs the heavens and the earth. Through this power, He exalts His obedient children, bringing to pass “the immortality and eternal life of man.”
Second, in mortality, priesthood is the power and authority that God gives to man to act in all things necessary for the salvation of God’s children. The blessings of the priesthood are available to all who receive the gospel.
What is the format of a baby blessing?
When blessing a baby, priesthood holders gather in a circle and place their hands under the baby. When blessing an older child, brethren place their hands lightly on the child’s head. The person who gives the blessing:
1. Addresses Heavenly Father.
2. States that the blessing is performed by the authority of the Melchizedek Priesthood.
3. Gives the child a name.
4. Gives words of blessing as the Spirit directs.
5. Closes in the name of Jesus Christ.
Ivy and Aunt Cambria
Reading up on the baby blessing beforehand taught me some interesting things about this sacred practice that I would like to share.
Unique to giving a blessing to an older child or adult, the naming and blessing of a child is directed to Heavenly Father like prayers are.
This could be because the baby is too young to understand the words directed to him or her.
It appears that Melchizedek Priesthood holders are authorized to more than ask for a blessing but are able to pronounce a blessing upon the child directly, as the spirit directs.
Sometimes inspiration (or confidence) to pronounce/give a blessing does not come. In this case it is of course acceptable to ask Heavenly Father for these blessings. I believe this is how I felt in giving Ivy her blessing. It was enough to ask Heavenly Father to bless her with my requests.
It is important to remember the naming and blessing of children is not a saving ordinance. It is still an important and sacred moment seen in heaven.
“It is an awesome responsibility to be a priesthood agent of the Lord, to act in his behalf, and to approximate in one’s words and doings what the Lord would do if he were here. A father, especially, who is to bless his child, has the delight and responsibility to prepare himself beforehand by pondering and by fasting and prayer, that he may be sensitive to the suggestions of the Spirit when giving the blessing.”
“How blessed we are to be able to present our little ones before the Lord, our families and the Church, and then consecrate them to the Lord. How blessed we are to be able to name them, plead over, pray for, and, yes, to bless them directly and personally in harmony with our finest desires for them, by the authorization and wisdom of heaven.”
An interesting account from Joseph Smith on March 13, 1843 says, “Twenty-seven children were blessed, nineteen of whom I blessed myself, with great fervency. Virtue went out of me, and my strength left me…”
“[The next day] Elder Jedediah M. Grant enquired of me the cause of my turning pale and losing strength last night while blessing children. I told him that I saw that Lucifer would exert his influence to destroy the children that I was blessing, and I strove with all the faith and spirit that I had to seal upon them a blessing that would secure their lives upon the earth; and so much virtue went out of me into the children, that I became weak, from which I have not yet recovered; and I referred to the case of the woman touching the hem of the garment of Jesus. (Luke 8).” (History of the Church, 5:303.)
Elder John Taylor said the Savior’s example of blessing children “should be studiously complied with without hesitancy or objection” (by priesthood holders).
We see that Joseph Smith followed the example of the Savior who blessed children in both Israel and the American continent. (Mark 10:14-16 and 3 Nephi 17). What an amazing and marvelous thought: our virtue can be passed to our children. Our blessings are a force Satan must reckon with. It makes me want to bless my daughter daily. It also adds insight to a scripture that has always been a bit puzzling in Luke 8:46. Virtue can literally leave us to help others.
The new name:
A new name is often involved when a covenant relationship is formed.
When Adam and Eve were given dominion over the earth, Adam named all the animals (Genesis 2:19-20).
When we get baptized we follow a similar pattern, taking upon us a new name, the name of Christ.
Temple covenants also involve the giving and receiving of names.
The responsibility of blessing a child is bestowed, ideally, on he who helped create that child’s body, and who Heavenly Father entrusted His child with in mortality.
Joseph F. Smith – “The patriarchal order is of divine origin and will continue throughout time and eternity. There is, then, a particular reason why men, women, and children should understand this order and authority in the households of the people of God and seek to make it what God intended it to be, a qualification and preparation for the highest exaltation of his children. In the home, the presiding authority is always vested in the father, and in all home affairs and family matters there is no other authority paramount…This authority carries with it a responsibility, and a grave one, as well as its rights and privileges, and men cannot be too exemplary in their lives, nor fit themselves too carefully to live in harmony with this important and God-ordained rule of conduct in the family organization.”
It is my experience that giving blessings is often the closest I ever feel to Heavenly Father. I can feel him speaking through me and it is always a powerful, emotional, and memorable experience. The opportunity to bless my daughter will be one of the greatest moments of my life. I have immense gratitude to my Heavenly Father for entrusting Ivy into my care, allowing me to name her, and trusting me to watch over and protect her in this life and through eternity.
Since I wrote that dramatic post about my near death it’s probably good etiquette to write a follow up about how I’m recovering.
The human body is a truly extraordinary thing. Blows my mind that some people think this thing that has a trillion parts working perfectly together can have fallen together like a puzzle from the sky. My healing has gone extremely well. It’s gone so well that Beth has had to remind me on multiple occasions about the seriousness of my accident.
Seriously. I think about what happened, and it doesn’t coincide with how smoothly my recovery has been. That’s not to say it’s been a complete walk in the park. There is a fair amount of pain, my head is constantly leaking, my arm hurts. All in all, it’s not that bad.
The truth is, my comfortable recovery may be due in large part to my on-staff nurse (I love you!). Beth has been the most attentive, caring, helpful person ever. Sometimes I wonder how she’s caring for me and a newborn all at the same time. Beth has daily and sometimes multiple times a day re-dressed my wounds. She’s taken off the bandages, helped clean, re-anoint, re-bandage my head and shoulder at least once a day since I was hurt. No wonder I’m healing well.
There was one night that was extraordinarily painful. The fifth night I think it was. We had wrapped my arm and shoulder like normal. Over the course of the night it itched and stung and hurt. Around 11pm I unwrapped the wound. I applied more ointment which didn’t help. Then I made a potentially grave mistake. We have some antiseptic numbing spray that in bold red letters on the bottle says “NO STING.” The greatest act of false advertising in the history of false advertising. The only defense I can think of is maybe they claim it’s no sting, instead it BURNS. It hurt so bad.
I spent four hours basically pacing around in pain. It’s crazy, a gaping head wound and it’s the road rash that is hurting, by far, the most.
Again, I feel extraordinarily blessed with how I’ve improved. I even worked a half day the first week. I would have worked another half day if not for the great night of burning arm. I attribute my recovery, apart from my visible angel here with me (Beth), to the same thing I attribute my life. I believe God and angels I can’t see are attending to me daily.
I want to thank everyone for their support while I’ve been hurt. It’s heart-warming to get messages of love and care from so many people.
In my last post I talked about the two things my mind rested on. God and family. There’s something that wasn’t said that I want to make sure is extremely clear. Family doesn’t only mean blood family. We’re all family here and while I’ve been blessed with the most amazing blood family, in-laws, wife, and daughter, it’s my extended, non-blood family that feels over the top.
As I’ve been hurt I’ve thought about all the people in my life that I can rely on. When I came to Arizona I moved away from all family. I didn’t know that I’d end up having so many people basically adopt me into their care. Friends that will drop anything to help me, offers for me to come over for holidays, help moving, help with my car. I was blessed with a roommate who’s family became my family away from home.
There are so many people I owe so much to.
This is personal, something I’ve never told anyone. In my prayers I often ask God what I did to deserve so much love? A loving family, loving friends. So many people that care for and watch out for me. It’s something I’ve asked often. I don’t know what I did to deserve so many amazing people in my life. All I know is I’m grateful for them.
So, thank you everyone for continuing to help us and watch over us. Thank you for the love. It means so much.
God and family.
____________________________________
Here is the progression of my arm healing (If you’re looking for day by day healing updates on my head, gross, go watch pimple popper videos). By the way, I’m not flexing in all those pictures, I still can’t fully extend my right arm:
Day 1
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 3
Day 3
Day 3
Day 4
Day 4
Day 5
Day 11
Day 11
Can’t end with mutilated arm pictures, to lighten things up:
I don’t recommend books to people often. This book I recommended directly to a cousin. This was a great book. I wonder if I say that about every book I read…
At Peace in the Light is a true story of a man who has died twice. Both times he was struck by lightning. Both times he returned to his body.
I guess not everyone would believe this to be a true story. I love near death experiences. I am all in on belief in near death experiences. They often support what I believe to be true of the afterlife.
I often joke that being struck by lighting would be the way to go. I say that’s a clear indication that God needs you back pronto. Dannion’s story made me rethink this slightly. His return to his body was an excruciating experience. His body was destroyed both times, inside and out, by the lightning strike.
Two very interesting points from this book.
Dannion’s near death experience gave him special abilities.
Dannion became famous as a psychic. It seems whatever happened to him left him with some ability to speak or understand the souls of individuals around him. It’s fascinating to read his description of his “powers” for lack of a better word.
Dannion’s near death experience led him into an interesting career change.
After Dannion was struck by lightning he received clear instruction on what he was supposed to do. His purpose was to setup a center to help people spiritually transition into death. Dannion describes a major issue with our society being the fear of death. It was his new purpose in life to help people transition into their next life.
It’s partly for this reason that Dannion transitioned into hospice care. To hear Dannion describe the rewarding experience of caring for the dying made me reconsider somewhat what is important in life. Near death experience books often help me re-orient my priorities.
We live this life to die. Ultimately, the most important moment of this life will be how we die.
I have a new appreciation for the sanctity and importance of hospice care. The cousin I recommended this book to works in this field.
I have had one experience with “assisting” someone (for lack of a better word) who was near death. A friend’s mother-in law was nearing the end. She had battled with cancer and it was time. This friend is not a member of my faith, but, in his words, “we don’t really know our priest. We know you.” So, he asked me to come give her a priesthood blessing.
It was a unique, uplifting, powerful experience I will never forget. This lady I didn’t know, had never met, was so frail. You never know what a person is thinking in these last moments. It’s hard to understand the pain, fear, acceptance, peace; whatever emotions and feelings they are experiencing. It was an honor to get to lay my hands on her head and let her know her Father wanted her home, and soon the pain would be gone. Soon she would be happier than she could imagine. Though she would miss her children here, and they would miss her, it was time for her to progress into the next part of her journey.
This was one experience I had with a person moving on. It has impacted me ever since. It was something I’ll never forget. Imagine having thousands of these important experiences.
For anyone that hasn’t read a near death experience book, At Peace in the Light may not be the best place to start. It kind of jumps into the topic. I still recommend it. It may leave you asking for more.
Ivy came today. I’m writing this in a bit of a haze. I keep getting told to get used to it.
Beth started having contractions around 2AM this morning. Apparently I asked her if she was OK around 2:30AM. Don’t have a complete recollection of that.
Around 5AM her water broke. We were at the hospital around 6AM. Beth got checked in and I believe was around 3.5cm.
At 6:30AM I received a text from my father-in-law (shout out Keith Cannon), “Of course we’re praying for Beth and Ivy. But also for you. I hope you stay conscious. Good luck.”
Between 6AM and 8:30AM things moved very quickly.
At 7:57AM I texted my mom and told her Beth seemed to be in so much pain. They wanted her to finish some pitocin.
I think it was 8:30AM when they came back in and kind of freaked out. Beth was in excruciating pain and at about 9cm. 10cm (I learned) is what is needed to start delivery.
I started getting our stuff together while they quickly wheeled her to the delivery room. When I came out into the hallway they were gone. I started wandering and came upon a man in scrubs. I asked him if someone came this way and he asked who. I told him he would have known if they did. I walked down the other hall and came up to a nurse. She asked what I was looking for and I said, “the screaming.” She led me to the delivery room.
I texted my mom from the delivery room at 9:07am, “Close.”
They finally got the epidural in at that time which made things drastically better. Beth improved immediately.
From 9:07AM to 9:23AM Beth went from writhing, screaming, and crying in pain to texting my mom. “Epidural has kicked in and I’m 10cm. I’ll probably deliver in an hour or so. They were shocked how fast I was moving.”
I’ve heard over and over about this thing that happens when becoming a father. I can’t emphasize it enough. I can’t say it with adequate enthusiasm or exaggeration.
When I first saw Ivy James Quackenbush my heart expanded, my world flipped upside down. In an instant I realized I would do anything, I would give my life without a second thought and at a moment’s notice for that beautiful soul. She was perfect, so beautiful.
I wish I could put it into words, but they’re not enough. My life as I knew it was over. And I knew it. This little thing was the new center. The center of my universe- along with Beth.
Watching what Beth went through, so much pain, to bring this life into the world. I instantly had something open up inside of me. Appreciation for my mother. ‘She went through this for me?!?!’ Love and awe at the strength of my wife and all women. How can a man walk out on a wife after seeing her bring the most important thing in the world, into the world? I thought of so many mothers – Eve, Mary, my mom, my wife. My Ivy.
How can women be treated the way they are in the world when they are the entire world? They’re why we’re all here.
I loved these two in a way I didn’t know was possible.
I couldn’t stop staring at Ivy. The gravitational pull of the universe had changed.
Beth held her and she screamed. Let the record show I cut the cord. She screamed and it was simultaneously the most fascinating and most beautiful sound I’d ever heard. I didn’t know a scream could be so powerful.
I put my finger out and Ivy grabbed. She stopped screaming. The nurses started to take her for measurements and she wouldn’t let go of my finger. My heart!
I followed her. The thoughts I hadn’t let start because her coming had always been surreal started to flood my mind: I’m going to play basketball with her. I hope she loves basketball. We’ll play together. We’ll be best friends. I hope I never hurt her. I hope I can always protect her.
How does Heavenly Father love me? I’m a little closer to understanding today. I’m a little closer to understanding what true love is.
Ivy James Quackenbush and Elisabeth Brooke Quackenbush. My family.
No Coincidences 