No Coincidences

Tag: grandparents

  • Becoming a Father

    Becoming a Father

    I wrote and posted a first 48 hour update when Ivy was born. At the time I wrote some ramblings from the hospital. I never posted but wanted to share, even though it’s been a couple years since this was written. It’s funny to read back on the simplicity of a newborn. Oh how life has changed with two little ones. Here are those ramblings followed by a thought about my grandparents at the end:

    36 hours in the hospital.

    Swaddling and diapers.

    Resting and food.

    That seems to be the cycle of the last 36 hours. Beth feeds Ivy, change diaper, swaddle, Beth feeds Ivy, breakfast. Repeat before lunch. Repeat before dinner. In between that is rest.

    I’ve never spent this much time in a hospital. I know many have. It’s an interesting existence. I can’t say I dislike it too much. I have writing, reading, tv. What else could I need? Oh, my wife and baby.

    Ivy has been so great. She only sleeps and eats. Those are her two modes so far.

    I’m told this won’t last long. My fingers are still crossed.

    We’ve joked that thus far she has my demeanor (calm?) I’m hopeful it continues.

    I can’t say enough about how kind the nurses have been here. They have been so helpful, attentive, patient. All the good things.

    In the morning soon before the 24-hour mark we mentioned we would like to go home if that was a possibility. Within an hour it felt like 5 nurses came in to do this check or that, this test, that test. I guess they’re fine with us leaving if we’d like to. We live near the hospital so it’s not a worry to us to leave.

    My grandfather, Frank Leach, called me while in the hospital. We had a great discussion about life, parenthood, and faith. With this new life, Ivy James, in my life, and this call from one of my progenitors, it got me thinking about the Circle of Life.

    Disney’s song gives a touchingly accurate portrayal of the Father’s Plan for us here. What would I be without my grandparents? Love has afforded me much.

    What would I be without the foundation they laid? Three of my grandparents are converts to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. My prayers are often filled with gratitude to my Heavenly Father for faith-filled grandparents who did really difficult things, made difficult life choices, made difficult changes, so that I could enjoy the fruits of the Gospel of Jesus Christ today. 

    My grandparents on both sides are spiritual giants and I have been extraordinarily blessed by them and the lives they lived.

    Thank you, Virginia Quackenbush, Stan Quackenbush, Sandra Leach, and Frank Leach. How blessed I am to forever have you and thank you for all you’ve afforded me.

    Re-reading this and now thinking about my Ivy and my Sage. How different Sage is from Ivy. More on that another day. How lucky I am to have this little family.

  • Letter to Grandpa Q

    Letter to Grandpa Q

    My grandpa Stan recently turned 90 years old. For his birthday, all his children and grandchildren wrote him a letter. This is the letter I wrote to my grandpa.

    Grandpa,

    One of my earliest memories was my first and only trip to Grandaddy Lake. It was horrible. Keep in mind, I was maybe 4. It rained the whole time. It was so miserable. But I still remember it.

    I remember hiking back after the long week there. It was raining. I’m not sure it ever stopped raining. I was walking through mud, and I was crying. Everyone else was hiking with big backpacks for the trip. I had my little toy backpack on, and I was crying about it, about the hike, about the rain, about the mud, about my miserable existence.

    You got frustrated with me. It was the only time I recall seeing you frustrated/angry/mad. I cried more.

    My dad took my little backpack. I still have a memory of my dad shirtless, hiking in the rain. He was hiking now with his huge backpack on his back and my little backpack on his shoulder.

    I looked around at all my aunts, uncles, you, and my dad and realized no one else was complaining. Everyone was cold, wet, and frustrated, but no one was complaining.

    This core memory has stuck with me. I like to think it impacted me and in some minor, or possibly major ways, has shaped me.

    The Las Vegas Quackenbush clan (my family) has never been to Granddaddy Lake. We have our modern-day equivalent. We now go to the theme park Six Flags Magic Mountain multiple times a year. It is a requirement that any future in-law go through the gauntlet of a 12-hour day at Magic Mountain before they can even think about being accepted into the family.

    When Beth came to Six Flags with us for the first time, we were all so happy because there was a high heat warning. The lines were great! Meanwhile, we almost died. My roommate came with us to Six Flags once. He’s sworn to never return.

    I now have two daughters that I joke, tongue-in-cheek, about needing to remove as much Cannon from (Beth’s maiden name) and insert as much Quackenbush into as possible.

    This is the Grandaddy Lake mindset. More importantly, this is what it is to be a Quackenbush. I take pride in my name.

    I take pride in you.

    I take pride in our pioneer roots.

    I take pride in the foundation of faith I have been afforded.

    I take pride in what you and Grandma built, for me.

    I take pride in what you and Grandma built, for my family, for my daughters.

    I want to thank you for choosing an eternal companion of from among the devoted young women of The Kingdom. That is a line from my patriarchal blessing. I was able to choose an eternal companion who is an amazing mother, wife, and person because of you. I am able to raise my daughters with a confidence in things eternal because of you and Grandma. I am able to see the bigger picture, endure, have faith, progress, learn, grow, and get better, all with an understanding of who I am and where I come from, because of you and Grandma.

    I don’t know what I did to earn the position in the family I’ve been given, but I thank you.

    I look forward to one day having a life review. I hope to see some or all of your life review and Grandma’s life review. I look forward to one day seeing all the sacrifices endured and trials met head on by Grandma and yourself so that I could have the mortal experience I have been afforded. You and Grandma are a foundation. You created a foundation. In this life I’ll never fully understand all you went through and struggled with so I could have what I have. One day, I hope to understand. On that day, I will stand, and I will kneel, and I will thank my progenitors, you, for what you did for me. We all will.

    Thank you. We love you. We are grateful for you.

    With all the love you deserve, and I can give,

    Brayden