Sometimes I look at my dog and think, “he wouldn’t last 5 minutes out in the real world.” If he had to go out and hunt/scavenge for food and water, on his own, no chance. Being cute getting someone to give him food and water would be his only chance at survival. If that option is removed, he’s a goner.
Look at this picture. It looks like he just ate a plate of strawberries and his afternoon plans are to lounge and get belly rubs.
Granted, he is an 8-pound poodle/terrier mix. He wasn’t bred to survive in the wild. He was bred to be cute and to get people to give him stuff. I’m just saying, removing that option = goner.
I can already hear the “big” dog owners. “My dog would survive in the wild. Yours is closer to a cat, mine still has some wolf instincts.” OK. Your golden retriever is not surviving a week in the wild without its cute factor, just the same as my poodle/terrier.
My dog lives the most cushy life imaginable. He sleeps all the time. He wakes up and eats. He sleeps some more. He goes on walks. Then he sleeps. He plays. He goes on bike rides. At 9:30pm he stares me dead in the eyes and I know he’s saying, “You know good and well it’s time for bed.”
It wasn’t until just recently that a very obvious and humbling fact slapped me right across the face. I wouldn’t survive a week out in the wild.
I was looking at my (adorable) little dog curled up on the bed, petting his soft hair, admiring how good he is, being jealous of how easy his life is, when I had that thought. “You poor pathetic creature. What would you do without me?”
Who was I talking to?
*Slap to the face.
What would I do out in the wild?
Here I was in my air-conditioned condo, with a giant Hydrapeak water bottle filled to the brim with ice cold water that I filled from my refrigerator. That morning I’d poured Berry Colossal Crunch into a bowl, pulled a cold jug of milk from the refrigerator, and had cereal, like a proper grown man should do. That morning I’d taken a piping hot shower. I let the water run long enough so that it was plenty warm. Cold shower? No chance! Running water came from a tap where I put a toothbrush I’d squeezed mint toothpaste onto to brush my teeth. I then sat in a comfortable chair and worked at a computer.
Who was I to judge my dog? I was living the same life my dog was!
Put me out in the wild without food and water and tell me to figure it out. Remove the option of me going to someone’s door and saying, “please feed me,” and I had no chance.
I don’t think we take the time often enough to
- Stop and realize how blessed we are.
- Realize how pathetic we are.
What would I do out in the wild without a can opener? Let alone having to hunt and find food?
I’ve recently read a couple books about the old west. A story I just read was about an 11-year-old boy who ran off with some Shoshone Indians (Native Americans). He lived two years with them. Eating buffalo meat. Hunting rabbits. Fishing for trout. I was amazed at the life this boy lived just 170 years ago.
Can you imagine if your ancestors could look at you now? What a pathetic sight you would be. Your great-great-great-great grandpa would marvel at your fancy light up information device and cans of food but would ask you, do you know how to hunt? Do you know how to guide yourself by the stars? Do you know how to survive without your pre-packaged meals and Uber eats? (Reminder- that great grandfather would be so perplexed by Uber eats).
Can you imagine your great-great-great-great grandmother asking where you keep the chickens? How do you grind the wheat for your bread? (Do you grind wheat for bread??? I DON’T KNOW!) Can you even cook without that radiation device that nuclearizes your food into something *edible?
While modern advances are amazing, truly amazing; we have become so pathetic.
That’s all.
Just thought I would remind all of us of that.
Next time you look at your house cat, little dog, big dog, or even your fish and scoff and say “you dumb and spoiled animal,” I hope you pause for a second and soak in the irony.
No Coincidences 