Author: Brayden Quackenbush

  • Republican

    Republican

    Ahead of the 2020 presidential election, I listened to an amazing, interesting, and intriguing podcast. This podcast hypothesized what would happen if Donald Trump lost the 2020 election and refused to give up the presidency. The podcast didn’t just hypothesize, they did a full-on war game.

    For those who don’t know, a war game is a military tactic to simulate an armed conflict between two sides. One general will make a decision – where troops go, where to attack, etc. and someone else plays the enemy, making counter moves. You attack here, I move my troops there.

    That is what this podcast did. It was described as “a political choose your own adventure.” So there were multiple teams: a Biden campaign team, a Trump campaign team, GOP elected officials team, Democratic elected officials team, a media team, and so on. The teams were presented with a scenerio and then they watched the teams respond. A literal political war game.

    What’s crazy is, I did some Google searching and couldn’t find the podcast. Why? Because no matter what I search, it comes up with a real result. For example –

    “Podcast about experiment if Trump didn’t give up 2020 presidency.”

    “Podcast about if Trump refused to give up the presidency in 2020.”

    These searches come up with REAL RESULTS. Does anyone realize how crazy that is?

    This podcast went through four scenarios. The one that they focused on was what would happen if the 2020 election results were ambiguous? In any close race there becomes some level of amiguous results.

    Do you know how some of those experiments ended? Protestors in the street. Everything short of civil war. The podcast noted that they had to cut some of their scenerios short because things got out of hand so quickly and the participants started to become unnerved at what they were learning.

    When I listened to that podcast originally, no joke, my first thought was, “oh this is how democracy in America collapses. Trump is going to refuse to accept election results and we’re going to have a civil war.”

    How close we came. I don’t think the average American knows how close we came to our democratic system falling apart. If not for a courageous decision by Mike Pence to defend democracy, that’s where we were headed. Mike Pence ended up getting death threats by members of his own party for that decision.

    Let me pause real quick. You probably think, after reading thus far, where my allegiances lie in politics, or even who I voted for in 2020. You’re wrong. That’s all I’m going to say. My own wife doesn’t even know who I voted for in 2020. Well, she “knows,” but I’ve never said it. She can guess. My point is, I’ve had to take a look at some things I value.

    When Putin invaded Ukraine and Donald Trump talked about how it was a smart move, that’s when I had to rethink some things, personally. It was a one-off statement. Except if you take into account January 6th and Donald Trump’s apparent feelings about power, it becomes a much bigger statement.

    Here’s the thing.

    What if the election was rigged? What if those sneaky Democrats, and the media, and blah blah blah conspiracy. Look, I’m right there with you on conspiracies. Ask my wife, I’m all about conspiracies. It annoys her. Maybe those dirty Democrats did rig the election to destroy our country. Whatever. I say whatever not to make light of our country being “destroyed.” I don’t mean to make light of politics and the seriousness of say, a legitimately rigged election, like what happens in Russia. I say whatever to lead into this –

    What if the election was rigged?

    Then every election was rigged. Why did the Democrats rig the 2020 presidential election but not the congressional one?

    Don’t send me all this evidence about voter fraud and blah blah blah. I’m sorry, stop it. Enough.

    If the election was rigged, then it just all falls apart. Then there is no democracy, there is no voting, there is no America. There is only insurrection. There is vying for power. There is civil war.

    That’s where we’re headed when we deny election results. Period.

    Maybe you believe your candidate got screwed out of the election. Maybe he really did.

    What happens if Trump wins 2024? Are results accepted then?

    What happens if he loses 2024? Does he accept those results? (Answer to that seems obvious).

    Are we, Republicans, going to support the path to civil war? Are you that big of a supporter of Donald Trump? What has he done to earn this devout loyalty of yours?

    Can we all just shake our heads and get out of this spell for a second? Donald Trump is not the Republican party. When did that happen? When did it become the party of Donald Trump? It’s so crazy to me to take a step back and look at sometimes. How did we get here?

    I’m a firm believer in Republican values, policies, ideologies. But are those ideologies worth ending democracy? Worth civil war?

    I don’t think so.

    Specifically in Arizona, we just finished a primary where the Republican nominee for governor claimed the election was rigged… even after she won.

    When I lose a game in pickup basketball, I don’t argue fraud. I don’t go back and reconsider the process of a pickup basketball game, and call fouls that previously happened. When I start a pickup basketball game, I agree to the unspoken rules of a pickup basketball game. I agree that we call our own fouls and if my team ends up with less points at the end of the game, then our team is off the court.

    A similar analogy applies to teenage boys playing video games. Teenage boys go into a video game prepared to cry that they were cheated or that the game wasn’t fair. “How did he no scope me!? I shot him ten times and he didn’t die!” I’m out of touch with teenagers, hip lingo, and video games, so “the kids” might be saying some other phrase nowadays. Teenage boys are consistent though, that they don’t lose, they get cheated.

    I know these aren’t perfect analogies. But I still believe it illustrates an important point.

    Our Republican candidates are already decrying fraud and a corrupt election even before it starts. They’re going into a pickup game saying the game is rigged. They’re prepared, when they lose, to call fouls after the fact. This isn’t how it works. When did the Republican party become teenage boys, crying about a rigged game before it even starts?

    This, in my opinion, is wholly unacceptable. You’re playing the game; you’ve agreed to the rules. Don’t run if you’re going to refuse to accept results that don’t favor you. Can you imagine that person in pickup basketball? Every time they lose, they refuse to get off the court and claim they actually won? That person would be immediately ostracized and removed from the game. Nobody would put up with that. Why do we put up with it in politics? It’s unacceptable. Lose with dignity. If the results come back and a candidate is unhappy with the result, say the words, “I lost, I concede.”

    That’s it. There is no other way.

    Well, maybe there is another way, in their minds: insurrection, force, civil war. I don’t want representatives representing me who claim fraud even if results favor them, akin to teenage boys.

    I know this will be very polarizing for some to ready. Surprisingly, it might have been polarizing to me a few months ago. By all means, I would love to have a candid discussion about this with anyone. Thoughts welcome. I would love to hear from those who support Donald Trump above all else. For example, I know the analogy of don’t play pickup basketball if you can’t play by the rules will have some say, “well then we just don’t run for office, or try? We just give over our values to the other party?” I know it’s not a perfect analogy. But what I’m saying is this:

    If you go down this rabbit hole of conspiracy, fraud, and rigged elections, then America as we know it is over. That’s it. Then it will be rioting in the streets, open warfare, civil war. If that’s what you believe needs to happen, if you’re that opposed to the other party’s ideologies and the risk of them winning an election, then ok, burn the whole thing to the ground. I disagree. But on that one, we’ll definitely have to agree to disagree.

    I HATE writing about politics. But I had to share my thoughts on this. Donald Trump still hasn’t accepted 2020’s election results. What happens when he denies 2024’s? Or, what happens when he wins 2024, but doesn’t want to be done in 2028 after serving 2 terms? If you can refuse to accept you lost an election, would it really be that shocking to refuse to only serve two terms?

    Then Donald Trump gets, potentially, his wish. He becomes Vladimir Putin.

    I don’t know about you, but that’s a scary thought, to me.

    P.S. It helped creatively to say I couldn’t Google search that podcast. Of course, I could go through my phone and find the played podcast. It’s a podcast called “Radiolab.” It is an episode titled “What if?” from October 22, 2020. Definitely go listen to it.

  • Sage Laura Quackenbush 9/3/22

    Sage Laura Quackenbush 9/3/22

    I’ve long anticipated this moment. I didn’t know what it would be like to have my heart split into another section. I talked about when Ivy was born, how my world flipped upside down. I’ve heard that the feeling of having a second child is incommensurable. How can you describe loving two things so much?

    Sage Laura

    I’ll be honest, when Sage was born, it wasn’t what I expected.

    The love for Sage, compared with my love for Ivy – it is different, and yet so the same. This isn’t a contradiction but, I think, a profound truth. I can’t help but think of Ivy as I look at Sage. I love them both so much. I see a glimpse of how Heavenly Father can feel.

    I can imagine how my Heavenly Father can see me and love me so much. And as He sees me, He thinks about my mom and my dad, my siblings, my wife, my children. When I look at Sage, I’m reminded how much I love Ivy, and vice versa. It is a welding link of love. This doesn’t diminish the love at all. It expands it.

    It’s the best I can put into words what having a second daughter was like.

    My love for Beth expands in these moments too.

    I couldn’t understand how I could love Beth more, or how I could love someone like I loved Ivy. I couldn’t imagine how my heart could split in three. But now I realize, it’s not splitting. It’s expanding. And with it, my understanding of Heavenly Father is expanding. I understand that His heart and love can’t possibly split for all of us. It expands for all of us. That’s how He can be the definition of love, He has so much to love. His heart has expanded beyond our comprehension. This is what I realized when I looked at Sage. My heart expanded a proportionate amount to how it expanded when Ivy came into my life.

    3 girls

    I got to speak to Ivy today. I pointed at her and told her, “You’re my girl, and I love you so much. And guess what? I have three girls!” Ivy’s eyes got wide, one of my favorite things she does. I continued, “I have Sage, and I have your mom, 3 girls! One Ivy, two Sage, three Mom. I love you all so much, my three girls.”

    It’s a phenomenal feeling. Any feeling that helps me to understand Heavenly Father more is amazing and special to me.

    I’ll be interested to read my 12/4/20 Ivy post after writing this to see how they compare. Right now, I am full of gratitude. Sometimes I can’t believe that God has given us this gift, His most powerful gift. He has trusted me to take care of His daughters while here. They become my daughters, but always His as well. This brings me so much comfort. I want my daughters to know that they’re never alone. I am always here for them, and so is their Father in Heaven. They’ll never be without a dad.

    I went back and re-read that post of Ivy’s birth. There are some things I wrote about Ivy that, if Sage ever looks back and reads this, I want her to know apply to her also. My two girls.

    From that post –

    “When I first saw Ivy James Quackenbush my heart expanded, my world flipped upside down. In an instant I realized I would do anything, I would give my life without a second thought and at a moment’s notice for that beautiful soul. She was perfect, so beautiful.

    I wish I could put it into words, but they’re not enough. My life as I knew it was over. And I knew it. This little thing was the new center. The center of my universe- along with Beth. (Now I have three centers to my universe).

    I couldn’t stop staring at Ivy. The gravitational pull of the universe had changed.

    Sage

    The thoughts I hadn’t let start because her coming had always been surreal started to flood my mind: I’m going to play basketball with her. I hope she loves basketball. We’ll play together. We’ll be best friends. I hope I never hurt her. I hope I can always protect her. (Now they’re my two best friends. Ivy is my MVP and Sage is my DPOY).

    How does Heavenly Father love me? I’m a little closer to understanding today. I’m a little closer to understanding what true love is.”

    I’ve realized something else now that Sage jas been with us 5 days. Yes, my world flipped upside down when I saw each of them. Yes, the gravitational pull was palpable. But what really develops that love into a bond truly unbreakable is the countless hours laying on my chest, the first grin that I get to see, the hours of bouncing and burping, the feeding, the watching them grow. I think this is why the motherhood bond is so powerful. Mothers often get more of these experiences than fathers, unfortunately. It is these moments that unite us to our children for eternity. These are the favorite moments of my life. When Sage lays on my chest and instantly falls asleep, I’m reminded I’ll do anything for her. I’m reminded how much I love her.

    I love my family so much.

  • Be Ye Therefore Perfect

    Be Ye Therefore Perfect

    There is a message recently brought to my attention in Matthew chapters 5-7. We all know the sermon on the mount. Don’t just not kill, also don’t even be angry. Don’t just not commit adultery, don’t even lust. Be ye therefore perfect.

    What comes next though? I haven’t before considered how the next chapters lead to a great message, a culmination of how we should behave and how we should try to be.

    What does the Sermon on the Mount transition into? What is the theme of chapter 6?

    Matthew 6:1 –

    “Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.”

    Matthew 6:20 –

    “But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal.”

    Matthew 6:38 (JST) –

    “Wherefore, seek not the things of this world but seek ye first to build up the kingdom of God, and to establish his righteousness”

    Matthew 6 is all about our motives. In chapter 5 you seek to be perfect by your behavior. Chapter 6 asks, “why are you seeking to be perfect?” Is it for the glory of the world? Is it for more temporal possessions and blessings? Chapter 6 looks at your heart and asks your intention. We should want to be perfect because we love God and we love others. We should want to be perfect because it’s right. Perfection shouldn’t be about us or what it does for us. We should want to be perfect because Christ was perfect, perfect love, and our example. Chapter 6 tells us to look heavenward in all things.

    Which leads us to chapter 7. What does chapter 7 teach us?

    The message of chapter 7 is summed up by verse 1 (JST) –

    “Judge not unrighteously, that ye be not judged; but judge righteous judgement.”

    You’ve worked hard to fix your bad habits, to be loving, to treat others as you want to be treated. You’ve then addressed why you’re doing these things. Your heart is pure, you love others because it’s the right thing to do you. You look heavenward. Chapter 7 is about understanding that not everyone is at the same point on their own journey to perfection. Just because someone is working along their path, and in your mortal eyes may seem to be “behind” you, they’re not. Judge not others. They’re working their way down the path of perfection just as you are.

    That said, we still judge others righteously. Righteous judgement is loving judgement.

    Matthew 7:9 (JST) –

    “Go ye into the world, saying unto all, Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come nigh unto you.”

    D&C 6:9 –

    “Say nothing but repentance unto this generation.”

    D&C 15:6 –

    “the thing which will be of the most worth unto you will be to declare repentance unto this people.”

    D&C 16:6 –

    “the thing which will be of the most worth unto you will be to declare repentance unto this people.”

    D&C 14:8 –

    “And it shall come to pass, that if you shall ask the Father in my name, in faith believing, you shall receive the Holy Ghost, which giveth utterance, that you may stand as a witness of the things of which you shall both hear and see, and also that you may declare repentance unto this generation.”

    What Christ’s apostles at the meridian of time were told to preach was the same thing those who were instrumental in the restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ were told to preach. It’s the same thing we’re supposed to preach today.

    Repentance.

    That’s what brings us and those around us closer to Christ.

    So, work on yourself first, Matthew chapter 5. Work on your motives second, Matthew chapter 6. Then, preach repentance to those on a different part of the path than you. Preach repentance with love and understanding. Never forgetting that you’re on the path too, trying to be your best. That’s all we can ask of each other. Do your best.

    From the book 40 Years And Marching On, an article by John W. Welch (p. 228) he says:

    “First is the acknowledgment that all people are at different stages in the eternal journey toward the glory of God, which is intelligence.”

    This is the message of the Sermon on the Mount. It’s not a one-part lesson, it’s 3 parts. Be perfect – be perfect for the right reasons – accept that others are not perfect (yet).

  • Ivy’s Love of Transportation

    Ivy’s Love of Transportation

    Ivy had the best weekend recently. We flew to Vegas to see my family. Fun fact about Ivy, the girl LOVES transportation. By that I mean, all things that move. Airplanes, cars (vroom vrooms), buses (round and rounds), tractors, go-karts. If it looks like it moves, Ivy loves it.

    Ivy had been on an airplane before, but this was her first, what I like to call “conscious” flight. She had some idea what was going on this time, different from when she was 8 months old.

    You can only imagine how exciting a place the airport was for her.

    First, she got to ride on the electric shuttle to the terminal.

    Billie, Ivy, Dad

    Then, she had her first experiences with escalators. Ivy LOVES escalators. Of note, she is not a big fan of elevators. I guess that gravity shift for her little legs is a bit much.

    Then she got to get on an airplane. Lots of curiosity mingled with excitement.

    Then we had a 3-hour delay and had to exit the airplane. Did Ivy care? Of course not! More time to wander around the airport, looking out the window at airplanes. Yes, we did do that for 3 hours.

    By the time we got on the plane to actually fly, Ivy knew everything there was to know about an airport terminal and was ready for the sky!

    She loved flying. She looked out the window and pointed out all the lights. She like to put her finger and thumb together to show that the cars and buildings were getting very small.

    Ivy’s joy reached a peak on our return flight.

    We had those moving walkways right by our gate. So we spent an hour straight going back and forth on that. I must emphasize that this is not an exaggeration. One. Hour. Straight. Back and forth.

    Ivy has recently started doing this thing that is my new favorite thing in the world. When she gets extra excited, she says YES! And clenches her first and pumps it in the air – “Yes! Yes! Yes!”

    Picture this with a happier face and you’ve got it:

    So, when we started down the tunnel for our return flight, Ivy remembered what was coming, going high on an airplane. She excitedly started walking in front of us, fist-pumping and yelling “YES!”

    When we landed at 10:30PM, her enthusiasm couldn’t be dampened by the late night. We got to ride her all-time favorite mode of transportation. A ROUND AND ROUND. If Ivy sees a bus, she’ll twist her hand around and say “roun n roun.” You know, because the wheels on the bus go round and round.

    When we got off the round and round, she was disappointed. We had to tell her the round and round needed to go to sleep. This was ruined when we walked back to our car, passing 4(!) round and rounds. The excitement at each one was palpable.

    Finally, we got to vroom vroom home.

    Thus ended the best weekend of Ivy’s life.

    Every time she has seen an airplane since, she points straight up, and says, “high.”

    She can’t wait to fly again.

  • Do We Really Want to be like Jesus?

    Do We Really Want to be like Jesus?

    I had an interesting thought recently. That thought was, do I want to be like Jesus Christ? What makes me want to be like Jesus Christ? Why do I want to be like Jesus Christ? What about Him makes me want to be like Him? Do others want to be like Christ? Do I know the attributes of Christ well enough to be confident I want to be like Him? Do others know Him well enough to want to be like Him?

    We hear so often in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints that we’re working to become like Jesus Christ. We have a children’s song (near and dear to my own heart) titled, “I’m trying to be like Jesus.”

    Why?

    When we say we want to eventually be like Him, do we know what He was/is like?

    Recently I was playing pickup basketball at a church. It was relatively competitive. Those who know me well know how seriously I take basketball.  There was one girl playing that wasn’t super competitive. She’d come the past few weeks and she somewhat lowered the level of basketball that was able to be played. 

    We were all, of course, nice to her. But some showed their frurstration in the level of basketball, I might have been one of them.

    This last time I played I decided I was going to have this girl on my team. I decided, not only was I going to have this person on my team but I was going to pass to her, encourage her, cheer for her, and we were still going to win.  The level of competition was such that, despite it being “somewhat” competitive, those were all realistic goals.

    After the first game this girl came up to me and meekly asked if there was anything she could do better. So I gave her some pointers –

    “If you’re open, shoot. Don’t pass back to us if you’re open,” and some general guidance on defense. She showed marked improvement and I was happy to have her on my team, especially over some athletic guys who could be ball hogs.

    Every couple games she would ask me if there was anything she could do better and I continued to give some advice.

    At the end of playing I told her how awesome she did that day and her response so, so warmed my heart, “thanks to you.” Such a simple statement.

    And in that moment I remembered something. It didn’t matter if we won. It didn’t matter that the game was competitive. Nothing mattered. Except that this person had a fun time, felt welcome, felt loved. Being compassionate and caring was vastly more important than any game of basketball, despite how competive and riled up I can get during competition. I needed that reminder.

    I come home from basketball often and feel good, happy. I usually tell Beth stories about what happened. It’s usually about some play I made, how the games went, how many we won and lost.

    After that night I came home and told her, “sometimes I need to be reminded how good it feels to be kind to someone.”

    Why do I want to be like Jesus? What is it about Him that makes me want to be like Him? What are His traits that I aspire towards?

    The answer is in that story.

    I felt better after that session of pickup basketball than I had in the last 10 combined. Her gratitude, and seeing someone feel welcome and have fun, was worth 10 game winning shots.

    Jesus Christ is all the love. All the caring. All the compassion. All the service.  All the joy.

    Why do I want to be like Jesus? Because loving others provides the greatest reward I have personally felt in this life. Nothing in this life compares to feelings of love, and the feeling of doing something right.

    This is in no way meant as a pat on my back for being a nice person. Jesus Christ is always a nice person, and He only asks that we be like Him in return. How interesting is that, consider it for a moment. Jesus Christ is perfectly selfless and loving to the point that all that He asks of us in return is to be perfectly selfless and loving to others. Is there any purer love than that? He makes this request not for Himself, but for us, all of us. He wants us to be like Him so that others can be happy. All He gets out of it is our joy.

    How amazing is that.

    I hope I can more and more every day, “try to be like Jesus.”