If you were born after the year ~1987 and I just write the words:
“We just got a letter.”
“We just got a letter.”
What happens in your mind?
How about:
“DARE to keep off drugs…”
You know that painful feeling of getting a song stuck in your head?
Ivy has started watching Blues Clues. Don’t know how I feel about Josh as he’s not Steve. The first thing I noticed with this new show was:
“We just got annnn email! We just got annnn email!” If you’ve heard it you understand the multiple n’s.
I was just at my desk staring out the window and I couldn’t get that doggon song out of my head. Then, I thought of better days and started singing in my mind, “We just got a letter…” and it came to me just like that. I could hear it; I could feel it.
It made me think about the power of repetition. Can you believe if I hear, “we just got a letter” 20 years later, I STILL sing that exact song? Why is that? Repetition. I must have heard it 100, 1000 times growing up, and I don’t even recall being a HUGE Blues Clues watcher. (I say that in the context of how Blues Clues took over the world in the 90s).
As I often do, I applied this to a gospel principle. Why is it SO important that we pray and study the scriptures daily? Repetition. I could read the Old Testament every day for the rest of my life and still learn from it. Nothing sticks with us humans unless we do it over…and over…and over… and over.
That is the way we learn and grow: repetition. Now if someone could work on a really catchy Book of Mormon jingle, I could get that book memorized.
“When you get to a place where you understand that love and belonging, your worthiness, is a birthright and not something you have to earn, anything is possible.”
Think about that statement for a moment.
I heard this quote in a recent meditation I did. The meditation guided this visual exercise: Picture yourself as a child, truly picture it. Picture yourself as a baby. Picture yourself on someone’s lap. Picture yourself being held, comforted, and played with. Picture yourself laughing joyfully as someone makes a funny face at you. Picture yourself young and innocent.
You don’t have to earn worthiness; you don’t have to earn love. You are loved because you are.
The next time you don’t feel worthy, picture yourself as a child. You are worthy.
This exercise led me to an even more powerful thought. One that speaks not only to our worthiness here, but to our birthright and our eternal potential.
Consider Adam for a moment, the first man. When he came to this earth, we are told he was as a child. Adam came to earth meek and humble, a child-like individual. He had forgotten who he was. Who he was in reality was Michael the archangel, the chief angel. Adam was Michael, the angel second in authority. His authority was only exceeded by Jesus Christ Himself (and God, of course). In Hebrew the name Michael means “Who is like God.” This Michael came to earth with his mind wiped clean, with no recollection of his prior authority, no memory of his prior self.
What about us? What don’t we remember about ourselves?
The next time you are insecure, unsure, or afraid, remember that you are a child of divine inheritance. You are a prince or princess of the most High God. Consider that for a moment.
Not only are you loved and worthy of love, you are loved by the God of the universe. You are in line to inherit all He has to offer (D&C 84:38). Remember that, and don’t forget it. Hold to it.
We are as children here. We don’t remember our past. For all we know, we were spiritual giants. We are spiritual giants. We can be spiritual giants. Embrace that identity. Remember who you might be. Remember who it is you have been tutored by. The God of Heaven and Earth. When we embrace this way of thinking and embrace this possibility, the difficult things of this earth become so inconsequential. Our true potential is greatness. May we never forget it.
A friend of mine wrote a book called Embrace Fatherhood. There is a part in the book where a father has lost the ability to see his new daughter due to a custody battle. Upon finding out he will get to spend a weekend with his daughter he says, “This daddy daughter thing, it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. It took Brooklyn being born for me to love something far greater than myself.”
I love Beth so much, but I relate to this statement. I think it took Ivy being born for me to understand what unconditional, unbounded, uncontrollable love is. We like to think we love others more than ourselves, but do we? I think I do love Ivy more than myself. I think this is parenthood. I would do anything for her. As a part of that, I love Beth all the more for giving me this priceless gift.
This book is written from the perspective of dads in various forms of relationship disputes, dads that don’t get to see their kids.
I know this is a complicated issue, and I know there are a million different circumstances that make this very difficult. What I will say that I hope we can all agree on: good fathers that want to be in their children’s lives, that for whatever reason aren’t able to, is a great tragedy. I can’t imagine being kept away from Ivy. It would break my heart. It would be like losing a part of me.
Beth and Ivy are in Utah for a week as I write this. Don’t get me wrong, a little bit of free time and the ability to nap and relax like I used to in the old days has been really nice. At the end of the night, though, all I can think about is Ivy and Beth. I miss them so much. I miss that greatest moment every morning. I’m grateful for a picture Beth put up on my bedside table before the trip. I can’t imagine this separation from my baby being a regular occurrence.
I know this situation exists for many dads and it hurts me to think about.
Relationship disputes happen. We are human. I think it is a tragedy of our society that romantic relationships would ever come before or between the most sacred relationship in the world (alongside marriage), the relationship of a parent and their child.
Again, a complicated issue. Having not lived through it myself, I can’t say too much. But I love Ivy. I can’t imagine living without her. There are tons of dads out there right now excited that they will get a weekend to see their child. The disintegration of the family unit is devastating.
I am grateful for Beth, who I love so much. I am grateful for what Beth has given me, the greatest gift in the entire world, Ivy who I love beyond all understanding. I am sorry for any dad that has this gift taken from him.
I love Ivy and I love Beth and I don’t know what I would do without them.
One of my favorite books from 2020 was Best-Loved Stories of the LDS People Vol. 3. I flew through this 539-page book. I was worried this book would be too similar to They Knew the Prophet when I began it. It actually had 10 or so of the same stories cited from that book that I noticed. It was infrequent enough that it was definitely a unique read.
What I liked so much about this book is the stories were split into categories. Categories include Conversion, Faithfulness, Pioneers, and 19 others. For the rest of my life, when I’m giving a talk on a subject, I can turn to the Table of Contents of the book, look up a topic, and read uplifting stories on that subject. Prayer, for example, has over 20 pages, 14 stories that I can go to for inspiration. A description I read online reads:
“Here’s an outstanding collection of all those inspiring stories from Church history that you’ve heard and wanted (but couldn’t find) for your class.”
I know not everyone (or anyone) likes Church history quite like me, but if you do, you will love this book. If you’re a spiritual individual who believes in God, you’ll find many stories that really make you think. The book was filled with stories that I had never heard before. Many push the boundaries of what we think is possible. Stories of angels seen by normal people, visions experienced by everyday pioneers, and profound experiences fill this book.
One story I enjoyed relates a man visited by a person long dead who was commissioned to bring someone to the other side to assist with a work. The living man gave the dead man all the work he still felt he had to do on earth and the dead man moved to another candidate. “Now, I name this to show a principle. They have work on the other side of the [veil]; and they want men, and they call them.”
I haven’t read any of the other books from the Best Loved Stories series. From what I gather, there are the Best-Loved Stories of the LDS People Vols 1-3, Best-Loved Poems of the LDS People, and Best-Loved Humor of the LDS People. At some point I may look into the rest of the series. If they’re anything like this one, they’ll be worth getting.
I particularly enjoyed the beginning of the book. There’s something about starting a new book that is so exciting. Almost every story had me turning the page for a new one. I must have read the first 250 pages in the first two sittings.
John Taylor
To conclude, I’ll share part of one of my favorite stories, though it was difficult to just choose one. It comes from one of my favorite categories: Courage. It is a story told by B. H. Roberts about John Taylor. John Taylor would later become the third prophet in this dispensation. After reading this story, it’s easy to see why. B.H. Roberts tells about a time when John Taylor was in Columbus, Ohio to preach. John Taylor was preparing to go when men of the town ran to the house he was at and informed him that a group from the crowd he was going to preach to were boasting that they would tar and feather him if he undertook to preach. John Taylor decided to go. After Elder Taylor had arrived to preach, the book reads:
“A very large concourse of people had assembled to listen to him. He began his remarks by informing them that he had lately come from Canada-a land under monarchical rule; that standing as he then did on free soil, among free men, he experienced peculiar sensations.
John Taylor said, ‘Gentlemen, I now stand among men whose fathers fought and obtained one of the greatest blessings ever conferred upon the human family-the right to think, to speak, to write; the right to say who shall govern them, and the right to worship God according to the dictates of their own consciences-all of them sacred human rights, and now guaranteed by the American Constitution. I see around me the sons of those noble sires, who, rather than bow to the behest of a tyrant, pledged their lives, fortunes and sacred honors to burst those fetters, enjoy freedom themselves, bequeath it to their posterity or die in the attempt.
They nobly fought and nobly conquered; and now the cap of liberty is elevated on the tops of your liberty poles throughout the land, and the flag of freedom waves from Wisconsin to Louisiana-from Maine to Missouri. Not only so, but your vessels-foremost in the world-sail over oceans, seas, and bays; visiting every nation, and wherever those vessels go your flag flutters in the breeze, a hope Is inspired among the down-trodden millions, that they, perchance, if they cannot find liberty in their own land, may find it with you … Gentlemen, with your liberty is more than a name; it is incorporated in your system; it is proclaimed by your senators; thundered by your cannon; lisped by your infants; taught to your school-boys; it echoes from mountain to mountain; reverberates through your valleys, and is whispered by every breeze. Is it any wonder, gentlemen, under these circumstances-having lately emerged from a monarchical government, that I should experience peculiar sensations in rising to address you?
But, by the by, I have been informed that you purpose to tar and feather me, for my religious opinions. Is this the boon you have inherited from your fathers? Is this the blessing they purchased with their dearest hearts’ blood-this your liberty? If so, you now have a victim, and we will have an offering to the goddess of liberty.” Here he tore open his vest and said: “Gentlemen, come on with your tar and feathers, your victim is ready; and ye shades of the venerable patriots, gaze upon the deeds of your degenerate sons! Come on, gentlemen! Come on, I say, I am ready!’
No one moved, no one spoke. He stood there drawn to his full height, calm but defiant-the master of the situation.”
John Taylor went on to preach for three hours. This story concluded, “they had been awed into silence by the boldness of Elder Taylor.”
In the time we live in I think this is a story of especial importance, which is why I shared it. More and more “religious” folks will have to be bold in our testimonies. More and more the freedom our ancestors died for is being attacked. Being bold and having courage will be of the utmost importance moving forward.
We’ve been having a difficult time with Ivy’s sleeping the last couple weeks. This morning I woke up and Beth was awake. I asked if Ivy got up during the night.
Beth laughed.
Not a good sign.
Beth said yes Ivy did get up during the night. She said she was rocking Ivy and could tell that Ivy was not going to go back to sleep. So she did something drastic.
Warning: this strategy is not recommended, and we know full and well this is NOT a good idea.
Beth said she GOT IN IVY’S CRIB WITH HER. My first thoughts, it didn’t break?
I looked at Beth and said instead, “…is that ok?”
Beth responded that of course no, it’s not ideal. It’s not safe and the crib could have broken. All bad things. Like the title of the post says, Desperate Times Call for Desperate Measures.
Beth continued to tell me that after a while she got out of the crib and successfully returned to our bedroom. A hero had slain the dragon. A cute little booty-up-in-the-air-dragon, but a dragon nonetheless.
She said she got into bed and Ivy started to stir and cry. Beth asked me if I remembered in the middle of the night her saying, “oh no.” Beth told me I then started patting her on her back. I vaguely remember this.
But then a miracle happened! Ivy went back to sleep. Hallelujah.
After hearing Beth’s tale, I started to meditate to prepare for the day. My mind drifted to this story as the mind is wont to do during meditation. I thought about that moment when Ivy cried and very well should have continued screaming until one of us came to get her.
A past successful night of sleep resistance. The smug face of a champion saying, “I’m the boss here,” cross-legged and all.
The coolest visual came to me as I was meditating. You see, that night was the first time in months that I slept a night without getting out of bed. MONTHS.
This is the visual that came to me. Ivy started to cry, and God said, “someone do something!” And a legion, thousands of angels came pouring out of heaven to comfort and console Ivy back to sleep. Heavenly Father was like, “give that man one full night in his bed.”
It was a true miracle and that’s the only possible explanation.
So I say, thank you Heavenly Father, I sure needed that.
No Coincidences 