No Coincidences

Tag: blessing

  • Monumental Moment

    Monumental Moment

    I’ve written about seemingly small moments in my life that made a huge difference on the trajectory of my future. I’ve mentioned a postcard. I’ve also mentioned a seemingly inconsequential invitation to join a basketball team (from that same link). I’d like to elaborate on that basketball invitation story.

    I was so nervous my first time coming back to church that I made my roommate come with me so I didn’t have to go alone. It had been years since I’d been at church.

    I only remember one thing about that first day back at church, and it was after sacrament meeting ended. I’d just sat through my first sacrament meeting in I’m not sure how many years. I was self-conscious, uncomfortable, ready to leave, when the person in front of me turned around in his seat.

    “Hey, do you play basketball?” He asked.

    I remember being blown away. I remember thinking, “Wow! The spirit is powerful here! How did he know???”

    I’ve thought back on that moment. Yes, the spirit was powerful that day. But not in a mystical, this stranger in front of me received a supernatural message that I loved basketball, kind of way. The world would consider that a powerful spiritual experience. What actually happened was equally as powerful, yet more easily “understood” by worldly standards.

    The truth is, as I now suspect, the person who sent that postcard went the extra mile. When I asked about going to church, after telling me where they met and what time, she also reached out to the Bishop of that ward. In hindsignt, I’m pretty sure I was brought up in ward council, a meeting where leaders of a church ward discuss pressing matters.

    I’m sure I was mentioned. I’m sure Kelsie, the postcard giver, told the bishop I liked basketball. That person who turned around in their chair to ask if I liked basketball was in that meeting. I’m sure he was looking for me.

    Is this any less miraculous?

    Is it any less of a miracle that an individual, who had never spoken to me before had heard of me and knew I needed friendship extended in my direction? A complete stranger stepped out of his comfort zone and said hi to a stranger and asked a seemingly random question. A complete stranger didn’t care if I was the worst basketball player in the world, he still asked me to join a city league team with him. 

    As a basketball player, that last part is significant. I would hesitate to ask someone I’d never seen play basketball to join my team. How do I know that person can dribble a basketball? How do I know whether or not that person knows how to play team basketball? How do I know whether or not that person is a nightmare on the basketball court?

    The invitation that day was about more than basketball. That invitation came from an individual who had heard about me, a wayward soul trying to come back, and followed a spiritual prompting to invite me to play on a basketball team- basketball skills be darned.

    That person’s name was David Lake and I owe him a great debt. I have thanked him for that moment. Such a tiny moment. I know he didn’t think about it much after doing it. That was just the kind of person he was. In that moment, a stranger knew me, cared about me, and invited me. 

    That moment made all the difference in my life.

    It’s amazing how a seemingly tiny moment can change the trajectory of a life. Where am I if not for that monumental moment? Did I come to church the next week? Did I meet my wife? Do I have Ivy, Sage, Wren – my own eternal family? 

    There are some moments that carry more weight than others, no matter how seemingly inconsequential.

    My invitation to anyone reading- the next time you’re at the grocery store, or the dog park, or the gym, or at work, and that strange thought comes to your mind while you’re conversing with someone, “Invite them.” Do it. You don’t know the profound blessing that can change a person’s life because you decide to step out of your comfort zone and invite a stranger.

    If you have been blessed by the Gospel of Jesus Christ, share it. Invite others. It’s the least you can do to thank your Heavenly Father for this gift He has given you.

    Beth and I were laughing how roommate Chris is in this picture but I’m not. David Lake prominently placed.
    Beth and I actually met through church basketball. Crazy huh? As you’ll see in this picture, couldn’t be seen too close to her, would be too obvious.
    A future wife, future best friend I still coach with, many lifelong friends, and saving Bishop all in one picture. That’s a miracle.
  • What’s in it for Me?

    What’s in it for Me?

    “Ask not what your country can do for you – ask what you can do for your country.”

    John F. Kennedy’s famous quote given in 1961. I think this has become a great weakness of humans today, and society as a whole. There are so few asking, “what can I do for you” and so many asking, “what’s in it for me?”

    There seems to be a great falling away from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is a great falling away from religion in general. I think part of this falling away is based on this “me first” way of thinking. What does a church do for me?

    I believe there might be a plague in the Church of Jesus Christ of this way of thinking. We all know someone who has left the church for whatever reason. All the reasons aside, there’s often a statement included that the church wasn’t doing it for them anymore, the church wasn’t helping them, or they didn’t see the need of the church.

    I would say, ask not what your church can do for you, but what you can do for your church.

    Now, to be clear, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the greatest blessing in my life, both temporally and eternally. It saved me from the gutters of this life. It has provided me all that is wonderful and beautiful about life. It has provided me a stable family that loves me. It has provided me a wife and daughters who I love. It has provided me a foundation to hold to in a world that tosses us all around. More than all these blessings here, it has also blessed me eternally with a perspective on why I’m here, where I’m going, and what’s truly important. It has provided me light. It has provided me hope. It has provided me love. It has provided me everything. 

    I say again: the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints which is how I know of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and Christ’s love for me is the greatest blessing in my life. Both here and for forever. 

    That said.

    The Church (and gospel) of Jesus Christ is not here on the earth for what it can do for me. It is here for me to learn what I can do for others. The Church of Jesus Christ is not here because of what it can do for you. It’s here to help you learn what you can do for others. The Church is a vehicle by which you can learn to be like Jesus Christ. I wrote about this in my post Do We Really want to be like Jesus.

    I think when we truly understand this, the world changes. It’s no longer, “what do I get out of this?” It becomes “what can I do to help someone else get something out of this?” This is what it’s all about. Love. Fellowship. Support. That’s why the Church is here. Not to bless your life. So you can bless lives.

    I’ll conclude with one last question, I hope you will truly ponder: did Jesus ever ask, “what’s in it for me?”

  • Inheritance and Lehi’s Blessing

    Inheritance and Lehi’s Blessing

    I have always been confused by the blessings of Lehi to his posterity in the 4th chapter of 2 Nephi in the Book of Mormon.  For one, there is the obvious blessing that is missing: Nephi’s.  For another, there seem to be mixed messages.  Laman and Lemuel have a blessing, but it may be removed?  What does Sam get?  Who is the actual new leader- Nephi or Laman?

    In an article titled Lehi’s Last Will and Testament: A Legal Approach, John Welch goes into great detail on the legality and custom of Lehi’s blessing, and answers all of the above questions. I’d encourage anyone interested to read his whole article. It strengthened my testimony of the authenticity of the Book of Mormon and reminds us of the real world that Nephi was a part of.

    I want to go over some highlights from John Welch’s article that explain Lehi’s blessing in its cultural context. Credit also goes to Alan C. Miner who put together the points I found most relevant to the above questions.

    Inheritance and succession was an important aspect of near eastern culture. It was a way of “preserving and transmitting the family estate from one generation to the next” (John Welch). Typically, the eldest son of the father’s first wife inherited his estate. The leadership of the family was also an important inheritance given. Faulk points out, “a father was free to choose a younger son as his successor, if he found the eldest unworthy of the office.” Sound like this fits Laman and Lemuel much? The father passed this leadership of the family on often through a special blessing (Deuteronomy 21:17), like we see in 2nd Nephi chapter 4.

    There are many examples of this spiritual or ruling leadership being given to a younger son including:

    1. Abel
    2. Seth
    3. Jacob (Israel)
    4. Ephraim
    5. David
    6. Solomon

    In each of these cases older sons were passed over as the spiritual leaders of the family.

    So, we have property inheritance and ruling inheritance. There was a third category sometimes handed down from the father: priestly duties. This is what happened with Lehi giving Jacob the priestly authority in the Book of Mormon. Another example of this was Jacob/Israel’s blessing in the Old Testament. Israel blessed Judah with the ruling authority (Genesis 49:10), Joseph of Egypt receiving a double portion through Ephraim and Manasseh (Genesis 48:22), and Levi inherited some priestly rights to the priesthood.

    As time passed in ancient Jerusalem, it became common custom for the eldest son to automatically receive a double portion of the inheritance. As noted, there were times that younger sons received different portions, or rights to rule, or increased inheritance. This was the exception, not the rule.

    This basic background information brings us to our fascinating story in the Book of Mormon. We have an eldest son, Laman, who was the eldest son of, what appears to be, a relatively well-off citizen of Jerusalem. This family leaves behind their land and property, to venture off to a promised land, a promised land Laman seldom showed faith in attaining. This family spends years in the wilderness, potentially months on a ship, and eventually land in the promised land. This elder brother is now over the moon with joy and enthusiasm. He will inherit all that his father has and be the leader and now king of a new nation.

    But what about Nephi? It was Nephi from the start that helped the family in the wilderness. It was Nephi that went back and got the plates so they could remember God and how to read and write. It was Nephi who built a ship to get them to the promised land. Nephi led the family, physically and spiritually to the promised land. He was the natural leader of the family and deserved to inherit the leadership, and kingship, of this great new nation.

    Lehi has a bit of a conundrum. How was Lehi going to handle Laman’s expectation to receive a double portion from his father? How was Lehi to handle the expectation from Laman that, as the oldest son, it was his RIGHT to inherit everything, despite his lack of leadership throughout the journey. Especially when Nephi had been declared a “ruler and a teacher” (1 Nephi 2:22, 3:29) by God Himself.

    This brings us to our blessing, and to the answer to the questions I always had.

    Lehi needed to appease Laman while attaching appropriate contingencies to his blessing. The main contingency was that Laman’s blessing would be applicable as long as he hearkened unto Nephi. This same admonition was given to Lemuel, Sam, and the sons of Ishmael. If they refused to follow Nephi, their blessings would be null and void.

    So Lehi employed three ways to diminish Laman’s blessing and role as the firstborn son. In diminishing Laman’s role Lehi enhanced Nephi’s. This leads us to the questions:

    First, why was Sam’s portion linked with Nephi’s? Why were there no Samites?

    Combining Sam’s inheritance with Nephi’s was similar to Joseph of Egypt’s blessing being doubled through his sons, Ephraim and Manasseh. Sam’s share of the land was linked to Nephi’s and therefore Nephi’s portion was doubled through Sam’s faithfulness, loyalty, and devotion he would show to Nephi as he always had.

    Welch discusses a second way Lehi diminished Laman’s blessing as found in 2 Nephi 4:5-9, “He [Lehi] blessed his firstborn’s children to the effect that their sins and cursings would be answered upon the heads of their parents. This could not have been flattering to Laman.”

    The third way Laman’s authority and blessing was reduced, Lehi referred to Jacob three times as his “firstborn…in the wilderness” and applied the priestly duties to him. By naming Jacob as another version of the “firstborn,” Lehi subtly took away from Laman’s claims as the firstborn son. As we remember, the custom in ancient Jerusalem was for Laman to receive the inheritance by default because he was the firstborn son. But, with Jacob also receiving a form of the title, “first born son,” Laman lost some claim on this exclusive title.

    Laman was warned that if he was disobedient, to God and to Nephi, that his blessing would be revoked. Lehi was, in a way, willing to give Laman the cursory “honor” of the blessing while putting many safeguards in place to keep Laman from actually ruling.

    This background context gives us additional insight into how the Nephites (followers of Nephi) and Lamanites (followers of Laman) could so quickly devolve into war and contention. The peace was kept as long as Lehi, the official patriarch, was around. Custom in Jerusalem was to love and respect the father (Exodus 20:12). But as soon as Lehi died, it was chaos. Laman was never one to heed faith or blessings, so the warnings from his now passed father were of no concern to him. He wanted to rule.

    To conclude, Alan C. Miner states, “Thus, John Welch has provided a plausible cultural background and answer as to why there were no “Samites.”  His words also give testimony to the fact that the ancient world of which Lehi and Nephi were proposed to be a part of in the pages of the Book of Mormon was a very real world.” The confusing nature of the blessing adds to the authenticity of the Book of Mormon.  Lehi’s blessing is consistent with the pattern an ancient Israelite may use in blessing his children. 

    I bear testimony that the Book of Mormon is a true historical account of families that originated in Jerusalem and eventually settled in the Americas. The more I read and study the book the more obvious it becomes. God has given us a second witness of the divinity of Jesus Christ, and I’m grateful for it. I’m grateful for a book that has been tested for 200 years and still holds up. I’m grateful to know God is still invested in us and our lives. I’m grateful for the Book of Mormon, Joseph Smith, and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

  • The Journal Entry of Beth’s Conversion Story

    The Journal Entry of Beth’s Conversion Story

    This is my wife, Beth’s testimony exactly as written.  Names have been changed.

    In a future post I will give some of my thoughts about this, but for now, the power of her testimony should stand on its own, unencumbered by any comments I could hope to make.

    Here it is.

    The Journal Entry of Beth’s Conversion Story

    April 20, 2016

                   I just read my patriarchal blessing for the second time since I got it. It confirmed promptings I’ve been having lately that I should do some journaling for myself and posterity so, even though it is past midnight I felt it better to do this than mindlessly fall asleep to some Netflix show. The past few years have had so much I don’t know how to fit everything I should write to remember. So, because of my failings as a journal writer, it will have to be a highlight reel of life. I just feel some changes that have occurred are too important to neglect to include.

                   I am in my third year at ASU. I love it, I love learning, but my diagnosis with clinical depression in October 2015 has really been a roadblock in my ability to work hard. Luckily, after dropping out for a semester, I’m slowly starting to feel like myself again. I’m not taking medication anymore but I’ve been hiking often and the feeling I get from pushing myself and being physically fit really serves as a great anti-depressant. So I’m back in school with just 9 credit hours, but hard classes. (1920’s senior thesis, history of college sports, and existentialism) I will probably graduate in about a year and do some sort of graduate school program. I previously had been dead set on going to law school. However, I’ve had to rethink my career path after being diagnosed with the depression episode. I don’t really trust myself to be able to go through law school. I always had 100% confidence in my academic capabilities. Now, I’ve taken a real hit to that confidence. My patriarchal blessing does mention that through my righteousness I will have many different career options. That has been comforting.

                   Life has been full of changes the past year. I think the biggest one that I will write on is about the ending of my very serious relationship with John for 2 ½ years and my decision to come back to church. I dated him from senior year of high school all the way up to just short of my 21st birthday. I really thought I loved him. He and I had plans to even get married one day. We were HS sweethearts and he was what I considered my first real love. I feel a real sense of anger at the situation but I also can’t help but think I will always love who he used to be and what we used to have.

    Initially, since about sophomore year of high school, I was set on not being LDS. I didn’t have a testimony of the Book of Mormon, I didn’t believe what the prophets spoke about. I wanted to live contrary to many of the commandments. I never cared to enter the temple. I was prepared to live that life with John too. We were definitely not living by LDS standards and that is exactly what I wanted. I was perfectly happy breaking the word of wisdom and living contrary to the law of chastity, among other things. Our relationship was never perfect. We fought often. He drank. I remember one day he drank so much he wound up in the hospital knocked out. For approximately 5 hours I sat there watching him, angry, upset, feeling betrayed, but wanting to show compassion. He cheated on me many times. I would often find messages on his phone texting other girls. He was perfectly fine with going out and getting drunk with other girls when I wasn’t around. Dramatic scenarios like these were often. I didn’t like who I was when I was with him. But I lost touch with who I used to be or who I could be. And when there were good times, I felt some amazing love. I just started to realize I had a better potential and I deserved better.

                   The changes came slowly at first. I remember when Clark was on his mission, I had one night where I felt so very, extremely alone. Not just physically but much deeper than that. It was dark. I was overcome by hopelessness. It was a feeling I almost lack the ability to explain. I now think it was a result of separating myself so far from the spirit that the light from Christ dimmed. I was prideful. I hadn’t prayed in years. But I did. I prayed in that moment. Desperately. I pleaded with God, please take this feeling from me even though I know I don’t deserve it. Immediately, my fear dissipated and calm overwhelmed me. That was the first time I understood how real prayer was. I wish I could convey that feeling to others. It was painful, scary, optimistic, and inspiring all at once. That was a start.

                   Any institute classes at ASU helped too. I didn’t mind studying the gospel from an intellectual standpoint so I liked going. I read scriptures. I discussed the gospel. I often was so eager to share what I learned with John. Sometimes he’d listen, other times he’d pretend to. It was awkward. I wanted to share what I found profound and he was resistant. But again, there were slow changes creeping in. I was realizing what the words of the gospel could mean. And he was realizing that he wanted nothing to do with it.

                   The real changes began around the start of 2015. I had quit or was about to quit partaking in most of the big sins I had been living in for years. I had already quit drinking and I was ready to cut-off the intimate aspect of my relationship with John. I had an institute class on the Teachings of the Latter-Day Prophets at this time. For some scheduling reason, I missed that class often. To make up absences we had to write papers on general conference talks. (Which I had never listened to previously in my life) So I did it. And that was a blessing in disguise. Again, I took it as an intellectual opportunity, like listening to Gospel TED Talks. At first I learned a lot. But then I began to feel a lot. I studied the atonement. And the friendship and companionship of Christ. I studied talks on being genuine and being compassionate. I began to slowly feel a change of heart, a softening of a heart that had been proud for many years. And even though I thought I was happy before, I started to feel joy. Real joy. And I started to feel love for others. Real Christ-like love. And I started to understand my divine purpose. The real potential I could live up to. Then came the dreams that gave the final push.

                   I’ve had vivid and detailed dreams for a few years now. Often they are silly. But often they are profound. Sometimes they even come true. I know that for many of us, the spirit speaks to us in dreams. For context, it is important to know I never wanted to get married in the temple before in my life and I never had been the kind of girl to dream excessively of my wedding day either. However, I had about four dreams where I was walking out of the temple in a white dress looking happier than I’d ever been lovingly holding the hand of a man. These dreams always ended right before I saw the face of the man I married. One night, I had the fifth identical dream but this time the man was John.

                   In addition, I had another dream that my friend Mike was home from his mission, in white, crying and saying how proud he was while hugging another person dressed in white. As he turned around it became clear it was John on his baptism day! So with these dreams I thought I knew what it meant! John and I would change our ways, repent, convert, and live happily ever after.

                   But of course that isn’t what happened. As a side note, I now have a different interpretation of those dreams. I think God was showing me what could be. What I should want to be. And as I saw that possibility play out in my dreams but realized that it could not be a reality in real life I had to consider what I truly wanted and expected for myself. After I broke up with John I had the wedding dream only once more. It was once again identical to the dreams before. But I saw the man I was going to marry. It isn’t like I could list a particular physical look I had for him but it’s as if I knew who he was anyway. As if the trust and love I had for him made me know him. And it made me desire so much to strive to one day be endowed so that I will get to marry that man and walk out of the temple with him one day. That was the first time I wanted to go through the temple. I now hope to be endowed and sealed one day.

    So after these dreams I tried to appeal to John, first by asking him to quit drinking. I wanted so badly to have the life I thought I knew we could have. But we were sent here with free will and someone needs to want to change in order to truly change. He did not want to change. The last few months were devastating. I thought I loved John, I was otherwise so happy, but my relationship was suffering. I was starting to open up to the gospel, to build a relationship with Christ. I was doing well in school, I was making many friends. But we had diverged. Thankfully I was blessed to be given so many obvious signs of what was right that I knew without any doubt there was no turning back from the Gospel at this point. I either go forward with this change next to John or I go forward without him. But I had to go forward And so June came, he sat on my front doorstep. We talked kindly but distanced. And that was it. I was sad. The man I thought I loved was gone. But inexplicably I felt so at peace. It felt okay. I felt optimistic. I sensed a hard path ahead but I knew it was going to be worth it.

                   So here I am with that journey under my belt. It has left me at times feeling damaged. I’m generally a confident person but I took a real hit to my self worth after this. The depression has made me feel like I’m not as smart or capable as I thought I was. My failed relationship made me feel I’m not worth someone’s loyalty or commitment That no matter how pretty or smart or funny or confident they think I am that a life with me wasn’t worth giving up something as trivial as alcohol. That my friends weren’t wiling to stick around when I chose to give up sin and follow Christ. But the gospel keeps me going.

                   I can’t wait to love someone that chooses to love me fully back. I hope one day I can trust myself to do that. I hope one day I can give 100% of my love and feel it back. I want to trust that I’m worth someone’s loyalty. I want to trust I’m worth a righteous man. I pray to become better through this trial so I can be worth it one day.

    And in the end of this trial I realize I’m grateful for it. I look to those times where I was given a sign and a testimony loud and clear when I’m beginning to doubt. And I’ve doubted. I was proud enough to think blessings would rain down on me immediately after this big step. They didn’t, at least not in the form I had expected. I’ve dated in the YSA ward but there hasn’t been anyone I’m seriously in to. In fact I almost find myself incapable of emotionally attaching to anyone. I’ve dealt with crippling depression. I lost friends. People decided they would choose John over me. They decided it was better to have the partying John than the sober Beth. I lost direction in my career path. But among all these trials I now understand what is temporary and what is eternal. It was the most alone I had ever felt. But I finally knew I wasn’t really ever alone.

                   I had to go through my own repentance process with the bishop. (Farnsworth then Thurston) It was scary. But I now love and feel the atonement for real. Every time I pray, I thank Heavenly Father for Christ’s atonement. I needed the atonement then, and I need it now. My testimony in the atonement holds me over when my testimony in other aspects is less stable. My testimony of the eternal nature of being is so strong. My testimony of Christ’s personal relationship to us through prayer is tangible.

                   I love Christ. I feel him there because he knows my pain. He’s been my friend when all hope was gone. I’m not completely myself again but I find joy in reaching out to those who I sense also feel alone, damaged, or scared. My trial has given me an ability to reach out to those in pain just as Christ does. And I feel real, Christ-like love that I’ve never felt before. I look at people with a new light now because of it.  I try to understand the principle of forgiveness because I need it. I long to maintain an eternal perspective because I knew what challenges there were to face on Earth yet I boldly said I was ready to do it. And I will continue to do so.

                   I look forward to the day I can look back and understand the ‘why’ of my experiences and trials. But for now I will press on with hope and gratitude. I know my Savior lives. I hope I never doubt it! I hope I never forget. I am so grateful for the hard times. I’m grateful for humility and for this clarity. I’m so grateful for my story.

    Elisabeth Brooke Cannon

  • The Redemption of the Jews

    The Redemption of the Jews

    How will God convince the Jews that Jesus is the Redeemer, the Messiah, the Son of God?

    Is the Jewish nation to wait for Christ to return in His glory for them to realize the truth?  Will God’s chosen people be left to learn of Christ’s divinity at the same moment that the rest of the world does, when Christ returns?

    Will the Jewish nation learn of the divinity of Jesus Christ when they see Him come down in glory, and behold the prints in His hands and feet?

    Has God provided a tool for the redemption of His people?  A second witness?

    I don’t think God would leave only one witness of such an important thing.  Especially when it concerns not only all His children, but His chosen people.

    So, what is that tool?  What is the second witness?

    Obviously, it is the Book of Mormon.

    Another testament of Jesus Christ. 

    I had this realization recently and wanted to share.  It’s easy to take for granted what the Book of Mormon is.  Another testament of Jesus Christ.  Another book of scripture.  Another witness.  More proof that Jesus was and is the Christ.  Jesus is the Savior.  Jesus is where our redemption lies. 

    What a blessing to live in a time where we have further evidence.  What a blessing that we have additional scripture.  I look forward, as the dispensation of the fullness of times continues to expand, for more scripture to be revealed.  I look forward to receiving more of God’s word.  Will the world reject future scripture just as they’ve rejected the Book of Mormon?  Surely God isn’t done with us.  Surely, He still speaks to us.

    I’m grateful for the Book of Mormon.