No Coincidences

Tag: happiness

  • Letter to a Lost Testimony

    Letter to a Lost Testimony

    Someone close to me once said, “I hope you never lose your testimony.  I’ve lost almost everything in life.  I’ve lost a wife, jobs, money, houses, cars, friends; but none of it, none of it, compares to losing my testimony.  I wouldn’t wish it upon my worst enemy.”

    This person, I’m very close with, I love him very much.  This person has completely “fallen away” from the Church, as we say. 

    He is a great person.

    I could have been him.

    I could have gotten confused by doctrine, church history, and the plethora of other things to get confused by.  I could have lost sight of the most important thing – Jesus Christ.  It could happen to any of us.

    I’ve long thought and pondered to myself ‘how can I help him return?’ Maybe I’m starting to learn I can maybe help him return, but I won’t be able to make him return.  I’ve thought about lectures on DNA, elephants, steel, and horses.  I’m prepared to discuss it all.  But in the end that doesn’t matter.  It really doesn’t.  The Book of Mormon will have its day.  Every knee will bow, and every tongue will confess that Jesus is the Christ. 

    Getting into the discussions that led him away from the church – DNA, horses, elephants – that’s not going to help him return.  Only the spirit, which I know he once felt, can help him return.

    So, here is my letter to you.  This is to a particular person in my life, but I think it can apply to so many people, to so many lives.

    Thank you.  Thank you for that quote you told me once above.  I think about it often.  Thank you for your kind heart, thank you for being an example to me.  Thank you for reminding me that Christ’s Church is sometimes only as good as we make it.  Thank you for encouraging me to read, and study, and KNOW it’s true.  Your study of the gospel is legendary.  I’ve heard of it not just from others.  I know you studied.  At some point you were deceived.  No more flattering words or trying to softly deliver this message to your ego.  You were deceived.

    It’s not too late.  It’s not too late to remember.  It’s not too late to regain your testimony.  You talk as if a testimony, once lost, can never return.  As if you know too much and you can’t go back.  I’m here to remind you, as I know God has over the past decades, that you know nothing.  Try to read again, please.  That’s all I ask.  If only to prove me wrong.  I know where peace comes from, and I want to remind you.

    I know maybe The Church isn’t for everybody in this life.  Or maybe that’s something I think so I don’t feel as bad when I can’t help someone see what I see and find the peace I’ve found.  I know you’re happy.  I know you’re OK.  But I also know you can come back to so much more.

    Finally, you were and are a good dad.  You made mistakes.  Your children love you immensely, I know that.  Don’t ever confuse your mistakes to be unforgivable.  I know life as a father isn’t always perfect.  You have children as stubborn and as difficult as you are (I’m looking at all of you).  Another thing you said about my dad has stuck with me since you said it roughly 9 years ago.  I am lucky to have him, but I want to remind you that your family is lucky to have you too.  We’re all lucky to have you.

    I love you and so does He.

  • What is the Power of Faith?

    What is the Power of Faith?

    What is the power of faith?

    Well, by it the worlds were made so… what can our faith do?

    I’ve written about a miracle I saw happen in my post Miracle Baptisms.

    I was once told a story that strengthened my faith and taught me something about the power of faith. By the way, this is a true story, not made up. If you don’t believe me, have faith.

    The story goes like this…

    There was a guy attending ASU.  His parents planned a big cruise vacation over the winter break.  This guy had been praying and looking for an opportunity to share the gospel with someone. Who? He didn’t know, just someone.  He had made a commitment to baptize a friend before the end of winter break.

    When his parents told him about the plans for the cruise he declined. His parents were shocked.  “Why??? We’re going on a family cruise!” He explained he already had plans.

    Best Large Cruise Ship Winners (2021) | USA TODAY 10Best

    “What plans?!” They asked. “What could be more important than our family cruise?”

    “I’ll be baptizing a friend at that time,” was his response.

    Oh… they thought.  Well, that is important.  They asked who the friend was.  He told them he didn’t know, yet. 

    Let’s break this down.  Here was a cruise.  It existed.  It was paid for.  It was happening.  It was a guarantee. 

    This guy, though, had another guarantee.  He had a commitment.  He would be baptizing someone at that time.

    Soon after the conversation with his parents (aka the testing of his faith) he was sitting outside on campus reading the Book of Mormon.  An acquaintance from class walked by and asked what he was reading.  A few weeks later our hero was baptizing this friend at the precise time his family was on their cruise.

    Some would say the cruise was a sure thing and the baptism was not.  The baptism was a pipe dream, a shot in the dark.  It was unlikely to happen.

    What role did faith play in this story?

    Obviously, faith was everything.

    Soon after declining a sure thing, an all-expense paid cruise vacation, the interaction happened.

    While this guy could have been on a cruise, he was doing something vastly more important, baptizing a friend.

    What is a cruise when compared to the eternal salvation of a soul, of one of God’s children?

    I don’t know the rest of the story. I don’t know what happened with the individual that was baptized. My faith tells something special happened. What if this individual joined the Church of Jesus Christ and devoted himself to it? What if he went on a mission? What if he baptizes five individuals on his mission and shares the Gospel of Jesus Christ with countless others? What if he marries in the temple and has five children? What if those children are raised to worship Christ and bear testimony of Him throughout their lives?

    Fact – that cruise turned into one baptism.

    Faith – that one baptism turned into thousands hearing of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and coming closer to their Savior.

    Where does faith end and fact start? – That’s up to us.

    “Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.”

    Doctrine and Covenants 18:10

    “And if it so be that you should labor all your days in crying repentance unto this people, and bring, save it be one soul unto me, how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my Father!”

    Doctrine and Covenants 18:15
  • The greatest moment of my life every day

    The greatest moment of my life every day

    The greatest moment of my life happens every morning.  By that I mean, almost every day I have a new moment that is the new best moment of my entire life.  It’s awesome. 

    I start work early every morning.  I’m already up and working (hopefully) when Ivy starts to wake up.  Beth has the monitor by the bed, so I can hear when Ivy starts to stir.

    When I see Ivy in the morning, her face is the most pure form of joy I’ve ever seen.  In turn, that brings me the most joy I’ve ever experienced.  Seeing her light up and grin ear to ear and be SO happy, it’s indescribable.

    I can imagine her thinking, “Oh, you’re still here!  This is amazing!  You’re still my dad!  I’m so glad to see you!”

    That’s what her smile says to me.

    This parenting thing is super hard.  It’s beyond exhausting (more to come on that in the next post).  There’s a lot of stress and pressure.  The life of a tiny human is in our hands, after all.

    But that moment where Ivy smiles at me in the morning, makes this, without question, the best experience of life.

  • God, Sin, and Joy

    God, Sin, and Joy

    *Edit -Two days before posting this I read this in Unlimited Power by Tony Robbins:

    “Let’s consider the habit of smoking cigarettes… They contribute to everything from cancer to heart disease… People have every reason in the world not to smoke. Yet the tobacco industry continues to profit, and millions of people continue to smoke cigarettes, with more starting all the time. Why is that?

    People may learn to enjoy the experience of smoking, but is that what got them started?.. What happened when they first smoked? They hated it. They coughed and gagged and felt nauseated. Their body said, ‘This stuff is terrible. Get it away from me.’ In most cases if your own physcal evidence tells you something is bad, you would expect to listen. So why don’t people do that with smoking? Why do they continue to smoke until the body gives in and finally becomes addicted?

    They do it because they’ve been reframed as to what smoking means, and then that new representation and state have been anchored into place. Someone with a great deal of knowledge about persuasion has spent millions and millions of dollars to convince the public that smoking is something desirable. Through skillful advertising, clever images and sounds were used to put us in positive-feeling states; then those desired states (paradigm shift) were associated with or linked to a product called cigarettes. Through massive repetition, the idea of smoking has been linked with various desirable states. There’s no inherent value or social content to a piece of paper wrapped around tiny tobacco leaves. But we’ve been persuaded that smoking is sexy, or suave, or adult, or macho…

    How crazy is this? What in the world does putting carcinogens into your lungs have to do with any desirable state? But advertisers do on a mass scale exactly what we’ve talked about in this book. They put out images that put you in a receptive, elevated state-and at the peak of the experience, they anchor you with their message. Then they repeat it on television, in magazines, or on the radio so that the anchor gets constantly reinforced and triggered.”

    My own emphasis (underlines) and commentary (in parentheses) were added. Eerie. This book is copyright 1986. Do you think advertisers have let up? Do we think Lucifer is deciding to go easier on us? Anyone reading the above might say, “well cigarettes aren’t cool anymore, and they’re definitely not advertised the same.” Go to any bar and look at the mass of people outside. Then if you really think things have changed, pay closer attention to the next liquor/beer commercial you see. Shouldn’t take long. We’re bombarded by them all day, every day. I’ll now get to my original post. That was a long side-tangent.

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    Quentin L. Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles once gave an address at BYU where he talked about a discussion he had. The discussion was about the influence of evil and the consequences of bad choices.  Elder Cook was given an interesting hypothetical: how would Lucifer present his plan to an advertising agency?

    “The adversary described his dilemma: he and his followers had rebelled and rejected the Father’s plan and had come to understand that they could not prevail against God. Lucifer understood that while the Father’s plan was about joy and happiness, his own plan resulted in grief and misery. The problem, Lucifer explained to the ad executive, was how to attract followers.”

    Lucifer would determine that the only way he could win would be to achieve a “paradigm shift.”  He would need to convince us that what he wanted us to do would result in happiness, joy, and freedom while following God would result in misery, lack of freedom, and bondage. 

    “This hypothetical meeting serves a useful purpose. The truth is, not only do the enemies of the Father’s plan attempt to undermine the doctrine and principles of the plan, but they also attempt to mischaracterize the blessings that flow from the plan. Their basic effort is to make that which is good, righteous, and joyful seem miserable.”

    It’s an amazing thing to consider how humans gravitate towards what destroys them.  As the lyrics from OneRepublic’s song Counting Stars says, “Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.”

    Consider the most obvious examples.  Everyday millions of people drink literal poison.  Here’s the amazing thing, you just read that and depending on who you are you thought of a different beverage from someone else.  There are multiple poisonous drinks consumed every day.  Am I referring to soda or alcohol?  Both?  How about cigarettes?  I’m blown away every time I see someone smoking one.  Like, “you know that is actually decaying your body from the inside out right?”  Don’t care.

    There are certain things that we have been asked to avoid in this modern day.  We don’t always know why we avoid certain things.  What I do know is that faithfully trying to follow God leads to blessings, both spiritual and temporal.  

    This leads to an important question.

    Why do you think God doesn’t want you to sin?

    Is it because He wants to control and tell you what to do?

    Why wouldn’t He just force you not to sin then?  He’s God.

    Why does God hate and abhor sin?

    God hates and detests sin because He know what the results of sin are: unhappiness, pain, suffering.

    God doesn’t hate sin; He hates the unhappiness it leads to.

    God is love.  God is peace.  God is joy.

    I think about this often.  I used to wallow in my sin and wonder why I was so miserable.  Now that I’ve drawn closer to God, I’m so much happier.  I see others stuck in the same pattern I was in and I desperately wish they would see there is another way.  You don’t need to drink alcohol until you forget, to find happiness.  You don’t need the lifestyle you think is bringing you joy, but you know is not.

    Does God want you to be happy?  An emphatic YES.

    Does God want you to have freedom?  An even more emphatic YES.

    God would rather you have freedom even more than happiness.  Otherwise, He would force you to make the choices that bring you joy.  He refuses to do that.  Your freedom means more to God even more than your happiness.  To find true happiness you must choose it.  To find true love you must gravitate towards it.  We see this in what He’s given us, our agency. We always have the option to choose.

    God’s plan, the Plan of happiness is meant to do just that.  Bring happiness.

    That doesn’t mean we all find joy the exact same way.  That doesn’t mean we’re all on the same path.  But I do believe the path of greatest joy leads to the being who gave us this whole experience.  If life is hard, come to God and he will lighten your burdens.  If life is joyful, we owe it to Him.  Joy, growth, and freedom go hand in hand.  We are meant to find these things during our mortal journey. 

    I use alcohol as an example because I believe it’s the easiest to use as an example, and because it’s what I have personal experience with.  I’ve tried that life.  I know alcohol doesn’t bring happiness.  In fact, the terrible impact of alcohol on young brains and adult lives is now medically established. 

    A study from Harvard in the 1940s on success and happiness found:

    “This study contains three significant insights.  First, adult happiness has a high correlation with childhood family happiness, especially love and affection from parents.  Second is the importance of a healthy, stable marriage to lifelong happiness. Third is the negative effect of alcohol on marital and lifetime success and happiness.  Alcohol abuse touches one-third of families in the United States and is involved in one-fourth of hospital admissions.  It plays a major role in death, bad health, and diminished accomplishment.”

    The above quote was from the 1940s!! Has alcohol consumption gone down?

    Notice the three things this study found that lead to happiness:

    1. Love and affection from parents
    2. Stable marriage
    3. Alcohol avoidance

    It’s no wonder the family has been attacked so aggressively the past 80 years. The paradigm shift has officially happened. Society says it’s about me, not my kids, kids take away MY freedom. Divorce. Drink and be merry. This isn’t happiness.

    When the gospel of Jesus Christ was restored on the earth, soon after, the advice was given to abstain from strong drinks (Doctrine and Covenants section 89).  The Word of Wisdom has blessed my life.  It was established a century before studies started to prove its temporal benefit.

    The Gospel of Jesus Christ brings happiness.  I know this personally, from my experience following it.  It only occurred to me recently that many of my friends and people I care a lot about really don’t think this happiness is an option for them.  I know many of my friends and people around me are happy.  That’s not what I’m saying.  What I’m saying is there is always more joy to be gained.  The Gospel of Jesus Christ isn’t an exclusive club.  I wasn’t chosen to be a part of it because I’m lucky.  I’m a part of it because it makes me happy, and that option is available to everyone. 

    I know a lot of people think “organized religion” or “God” or maybe even “a family” isn’t meant for them.  I just want to remind anyone taking the time to read, happiness is for everyone.  Happiness is something we all can find.

    I know many of my friends think I’ve become a religious nut.  Good.  I have.  The reason is because I’m happier than I’ve ever been.  I used to invite people around me to bars, or parties, or to gamble. I’ve invited people to participate with me in things I thought brought me happiness.  So why wouldn’t I invite every person I come in contact with now that I’ve found real happiness?

    I wish I could shout it from the rooftops.  I wish I was bolder about it than I am.  I wish I could tell the entire world:  you deserve to be happy.  Find your happiness, however you need to.  But I will tell you this, Jesus Christ is the source of all love.  Therefore, He is the source of all truth and light.  For that reason, He is the source of all happiness.  I’ve learned that for myself and hope we all can, on our timeline.

    I know where I come from.  I know where I’m going.  I know why I’m here.  I know what happens when I leave here.  I know I’ll be with my family forever.  I know my daughter and my wife, who I’ve known for countless days, going all the way back to our premortal existence, I know I will be with them for eternity.  This is true joy.

    I know these things.  Knowing these things bring me comfort.  Knowing these things makes me happy.  The choices and changes I’ve made in my life have brought me happiness I never thought I deserved.  This happiness is for everyone.

  • One True Church

    One True Church

    I initially tried to write this post with the hope of using scripture and doctrine and principles to convince anyone who would read that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is God’s true church, restored from the meridian of time on the same principles that Christ established while He was here.  I have agonized over this post.  Eventually I realized something obvious.  No one is going to read this and dive into the deep scriptural and doctrinal references that add to the truth claims of this church.  Plenty has been written on the truth claims of this church.  All of it by much more learned and accomplished religious scholars than I.  For the best intellectual break down of every truth claim of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, A Marvelous Work and a Wonder is the book to read. 

    What I can do is reference some scriptures, but ultimately give my testimony of this Church and Christ’s gospel.  This will be my best attempt to explain why it’s important to have one faith, one body, one church (Ephesians 4:5).

    Into some scripture from the Book of Mormon:

    “Thou hast beheld that if the Gentiles repent it shall be well with them; and thou also knowest concerning the covenants of the Lord unto the house of Israel; and thou also hast heard that whoso repenteth not must perish.”

    1 Nephi 14:5

    In a recent post He Lives I talked about why any church is important.  Why covenants?  Why repenting?  Because it turns us to Jesus Christ.

    “And he said unto me: Behold there are save two churches only; the one is the church of the Lamb of God, and the other is the church of the devil; wherefore, whoso belongeth not to the church of the Lamb of God belongeth to that great church, which is the mother of abominations; and she is the whore of all the earth.”

    1 Nephi 14:10

    It’s important to note that this scripture doesn’t mean if you don’t belong to the Church of Jesus Christ you belong to the Church of the Devil.  But.  An important point is made.  There is a church of the Lamb of God.  There is a church that if Christ were here today, He would be the head of.  There is a church that Christ is the head of spiritually.  It must be.  God and Jesus Christ have not left us.  What this scripture is saying is you either must follow the devil or follow Christ and there will be a church on the earth with proper keys and authority to help you in following Jesus Christ.

    “There is only light and darkness; there is no dusky twilight zone [in regard to covenant salvation].  Either men walk in the light or they cannot be saved.  Anything less than salvation is not salvation.  It may be better to walk in the twilight or to glimpse the first few rays of a distant dawn than to be enveloped in total darkness, but salvation itself is only for those who step forth into the blazing light of the noonday sun.”

    Bruce R. McConkie

    The beauty of the doctrine taught by Joseph Smith (given him from Jesus Christ) is that everyone will have a chance to hear the gospel.  Every one will have their chance to choose to walk in the light.  Agency is a core truth in God’s Plan.  Without agency it would all be for not.  What would our faith and devotion mean if it was by coercion?  There is an idea perpetuated by other faiths and churches that if you aren’t baptized you are doomed to hell or if you don’t believe a certain way, you’re destined for eternal suffering. This is not how God works.  It can’t be.  Where is the grace, love, and compassion in that plan?  Many faiths that emphasize the grace of Christ also claim hell as the destination for those who have never heard of Him.  All will have their chance to accept Jesus Christ as their Savior.  We are all the more blessed if we accept Him while here on earth when we are walking completely by faith. The covenants we make here draw us closer to Him  These are truthful doctrines taught by Joseph Smith that should speak to all hearts that believe in a God who is our loving Father.

    “Many in the religious world claim that no church is better than any other, just different.  As “all roads lead to Rome,” it is reasoned that all beliefs must lead to heaven.  If all religious paths do indeed lead to heaven, the righteous will be at a considerable disadvantage.  If the gates of the celestial city are to be thrown open that widely, why the need for Apostles and prophets, their doctrines, their priesthood and keys; indeed, why the need for the Savior himself and a strait and narrow way?  The doctrine of one true church is as offensive to much of the Christian world today as was the testimony of Christ anciently that he was “the way, the truth, and the life”” (John 14:6).

    Joseph McConkie and Robert Millet

    Part of my agonizing over this post was the fear of offending all my friends of other faiths. I would never want to disparage other churches and especially any church that leads to God and faith in Jesus Christ. That said, I will not apologize for claiming Christ has ONE church.

    “There is only one true way to eternal life and that is by obedience to valid covenants.  That is what the Book of Mormon testifies.  When one comes to an understanding of the Lord’s covenant process of salvation, what great things the Lord did with our fathers in bringing them to a knowledge of this covenant process, and that this message is being sent forth to all the world, then one can not help but become convinced that Jesus is the Christ, the Eternal God, manifesting himself unto all nations.”

    Alan C. Miner

    I can’t agree with Brother Miner’s words more because that is what I have experienced.  My baptism, the priesthood, my temple covenants draw me to Jesus Christ in a way that would not be possible otherwise.  I know others can come to Christ and be devoted to Him without these covenants. What shall be bound on earth shall be sealed in heaven. We aren’t here for worldy things but for eternal. I am grateful for my covenants. They draw me closer to my Heavenly Father, my Savior, and eternity.

    “For the time speedily shall come that all churches which are built up to get gain, and all those who are built up to get power over the flesh, and those who are built up to become popular in the eyes of the world, and those who seek the lusts of the flesh and the things of the world, and to do all manner of iniquity; yea, in fine, all those who belong to the kingdom of the devil are they who need fear, and tremble, and quake; they are those who must be brought low in the dust; they are those who must be consumed as stubble; and this is according to the words of the prophet.”

    1 Nephi 22:23

    I will not talk down on other churches. But does that scripture strike a chord with anyone else? Sound familiar. These are the churches of our day. They draw near to God with their lips but deny the power thereof (Joseph Smith History 1:19, 2 Timothy 3:5).

    This will continue to be a theme of my writing.  My greatest desire is for others to experience the love of Jesus Christ as I have felt it.  This comes through covenants.  This comes from knowing who we follow.  This comes from knowing what He has done for us. 

    I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is Christ’s church on the earth today.  There are many churches that do much good.  But there is one way.  Covenants are only binding if they are initiated by God.  The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the establishment by which Christ initiates his covenants with man.  This is my testimony.  In His name.