The Mourning Dove was one of my favorite books of 2020. It’s the first book I made Beth read. I read it in 2 days which isn’t much to brag about at only 84 pages.
The inside cover reads:
“A tender story of growing up, exploring life, exploring life, and discovering the boundaries and the defining moments of love.”
The back cover reads:
“The Mourning Dove is heart touching. It penetrates your soul and makes you glad to be alive.”
-Mark Victor Hansen, co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul
This story is so good, so uplifting, so all the good things. I will put it at the top of books I would recommend to someone. It’s especially easy to recommend because it’s such a quick and easy read. I know people are increasingly busy and it’s hard to find time to sit down and read a long book. This book is short and sweet. You will finish it feeling like you’ve grown immensely after spending time with Pop, the main character’s grandpa.
After finishing the book, I wanted to write a screenplay. This book would make such a good movie. The message in it is simple. The story of a young boy learning adult lessons is timeless.
I had no idea Larry Barkdull wrote another book I loved titled Zion: Seeking the City of Enoch. Mr. Barkdull has an easy-going writing style that I enjoy because it’s not so difficult to follow. His stories flow and are combined with good messages. I’ve walked away from both his books feeling like I’ve learned something about life and myself.
I can’t say enough good things about this book. It can be found online for like a dollar. Buy it. You won’t regret it.
Sadly, while looking up information about this book I learned that Larry Barkdull passed away in 2016. I’d like to share this from his obituary:
Many will remember him as their gospel doctrine teacher, home teacher and friend, as he tended to the needs of those he loved. Larry also served weekly in the temple as an ordinance worker, a calling he cherished. Above all else, Larry’s greatest joy was his family. The only title he wished to follow his name was D.A.D. He left his family a legacy of great faith and leaves a hole that can never be filled. Words cannot express the least of what we feel. We love you. Our hearts are broken, but we know we will be together again.”
I don’t know how you can read that without a tear coming to your eye. Mr. Barkdull was clearly an inspired and important individual sent for an important purpose in God’s plan. I’m grateful I got to see a glimpse into his soul through his writing.
There’s a serious question/joke every new parent has heard at least 100 times. Are you getting any sleep?
Why are we asked this question?
Because it’s a REAL concern.
Ivy trying to eat my hand when she should be sleeping
So, for all those wondering, how has our sleep been? I wrote about the First 48 Hours. How have the first five months gone? In a blur would be one way to answer.
I could go on for a while about sleep training and how much work and effort Beth has put in. This isn’t a mommy blog so I won’t go into all the detail. I will say Beth has done an awesome job helping Ivy to sleep. She usually puts her down between 7pm-8pm. Ivy will sleep until 6:30am-7:00am with at least one wake-up in the middle of the night. Some of these wakeups just take putting the pacifier back in her mouth. Sometimes it’s an hour feeding her a bottle and helping her back to sleep.
Physically restraining a stubborn baby
Before I provide my spiritual thought on this, I will stress two points:
Ivy is pretty good overall with her sleeping. We are blessed. Beth reminds me of this. While I have no frame of reference, Beth is in touch with all the mommy’s of the world and knows that babies don’t always sleep the way Ivy does.
Beth does the heavy lifting most nights as I work in the morning.
As I proceed with my thoughts on getting sleep with a newborn, please refer back to points 1 and 2 often. Every time you’re thinking, “well Beth is doing all the work, of course you (enter your feelings about my thoughts)…” or “of course it’s not that bad, not all babies sleep like yours has!” Please refer back to those points. I am aware of how blessed we’ve been in point one, and I’ve been in point two.
That said. My thoughts.
It hasn’t been that bad. There. I said it.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s HARD. I’ll say this, I think lack of sleep isn’t as bad as interrupted sleep. There’s something about having to get up every 2 hours in the middle of the night, even if it’s quick and you can go back to sleep. That’s what made the first couple months so difficult.
I recently heard another father describe the newborn sleeping phase as something like advanced sleep deprivation training for the military. As he said that, I thought, “huh, I don’t think it was THAT bad” (see point 1!).
Leading up to Ivy’s birth, I made some big changes to everyday habits of mine. For one, I’ve cut out sugary drinks completely. For those who know me, that included Hawaiian Punch or soda with lunch and dinner. That’s A LOT of sugar. I cut out the juice and soda about 18 months ago.
Leading up to Ivy’s birth I read a book that led to two other changes. I started doing a breathing exercise once or twice a day. According to this book it’s the single most important thing anyone could do to immediately improve their health. The other thing this book prompted me to start doing was change my breakfast habits. I’ve always had breakfast every day no matter what. My breakfast every morning is usually cereal and milk. My cereal is most often not of the healthy variety. Berry Colossal Crunch (Cap’n Crunch knockoff) and Cinnamon Toasters (Cinnamon Toast Crunch knockoff) are still in my kitchen from our last order before I changed this habit. Instead of artificial sugar for breakfast, I’ve transitioned to fruit every morning. Usually grapefruit and blueberries, apples, oranges, or bananas.
For those keeping score, I’ve cut out Hawaiin Punch, soda, and cereal in the form of straight sugar.
For those of you wondering if I still eat candy. Emphatic YES. Maybe one day this can be cut down in my life. We’re not there yet.
As I pondered on the past 5 months, and the difficulty, something occurred to me. Like I said above, I don’t think it’s been that bad. Difficult, not debilitating. As I thought about this, I thought about a scripture.
And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.
And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord.
I think this is the most I’ve ever related to this scripture. I’ve always wondered what it would feel like for burdens to be made light. The lack of sleep should be killing me. I have to be on-call every few weeks for work. A call at 3 in the morning that would take 2 minutes used to infuriate me. It would ruin my night and the whole next day. Now a 3am-4am feeding session is a pretty regular occurrence.
What explains that I haven’t gone into a fit of rage? For one, I love Ivy passionately. That helps. But I can’t help but feel like my burdens have been made light. Heavenly Father knows my prayers have picked up, needing this assistance.
I’ve wondered how the change in my eating habits has helped my energy. Does God miraculously give us more energy and uplift us? He can, of course. I believe more often He would like to help us by allowing us to help ourselves. I believe these new habits were inspired and I was guided to them. I believe it has lightened my burdens, and God continues to lighten my burdens.
I’m still working on the cheerfully and patient parts. That I could always improve on. But I am grateful for God and His help these first few months. I’ve felt His presence and assistance every day.
In the end, all the lack of sleep in the world is worth that smile.
When I was watching General Conference and the Korean children’s choir started singing “I Love to see the Temple” in a language I did not understand, something amazing hit me.
I don’t know why this thought was spurred by this song from these children.
That feeling was this-
I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ.
How blessed I am to not only be on this earth at a time when His church exists, but to be a member of that Church. Jesus Christ’s Church. His Church!
As I listened to words I didn’t understand but music I could never misplace, and as the spirit filled me and tears filled my eyes, I realized something.
If I lived during a time when the Church of Jesus Christ did not exist on the earth, I would have forever lived my mortal existence with a hole in my spirit and my experience. It occurred to me that if I lived in any other dispensation, I would have felt a distinct emptiness within me. Maybe this realization happened at that moment because at that particular moment, I was so filled to the brim with a spiritual feeling that I’ve come to rely upon so heavily.
What a challenge it would have been to live in a world without the Gospel of Jesus Christ in its fullness.
We live in a difficult and challenging world. But amidst that challenge I am a 30-minute drive from 3 different temples.
How blessed I am.
I am so grateful to live today, with the restored Gospel of Jesus Christ fully present, and His Church in full force.
What would I have done without it?
Maybe God knew I could not endure that emptiness. Maybe that’s why I’m here at this moment.
For whatever reason I am here now, today, I am grateful for it. Grateful beyond measure.
What do you think the point of organized religion is?
I had an obvious realization recently, only recently. The point of organized religion is to bring you closer to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. If organized religion doesn’t bring you closer to God, then why do it? I think it’s why we see so many people disenfranchised with organized religion. In their hearts and souls, they know and hope what organized religion will bring – closeness with God. When it doesn’t do that (and in fact sometimes does the opposite) they move away from it.
The second point of organized religion: to bring us peace.
This second part isn’t as simple as “I belong to a church so I am happy and peaceful.” We know that Christianity is not always comfortable. This peace is bigger than worldly comfort. This peace is the knowledge that you are right with God. This peace is more eternal than this life.
Why don’t organized religions do these two things? Some do, and I’m not discounting those who come closer to God and find peace in any faith. My point stands, that a lot of people have moved away from organized religion. Why? Why don’t most organized churches bring us closer to God or bring us peace? They don’t have the proper authority from heaven to do so.
God, through revelation has told us exactly what we need to do to come closer to Him and to have peace:
Faith in Jesus Christ
Start by simply believing in Jesus Christ. Believe He was born, believe He lived, believe He is the son of God, believe He died for you and your sins.
Repentance
Once you believe, be better. Don’t take for granted the suffering Christ went through for you. Pray to God and ask forgiveness for the mistakes you have made and continue to make.
Baptism
Religion has corrupted this simple principle. All God asks is you make a symbolic gesture to show that you have faith in Him, faith in Jesus Christ, and will remember them. Then use that show of faith to change and be better. God has asked us to be baptized. Follow His commandments and be baptized.
Gift of the Holy Ghost
The world is ever distracting and evil. God has given us someone to provide strength. The Holy Ghost is one with God and Jesus Christ and can be with us always.
I have the perfect example to help illustrate the important role the Holy Ghost plays. I received a text from a friend one afternoon while I was working telling me his dad had passed away. My friend didn’t want me to find out over social media, so he texted me. When I read it I initially thought selfishly. I was at work. There wasn’t anything I could do. I wanted to kneel and pray and cry. But as I was sitting there something happened. As clear as if a person whispered in my ear, I heard and felt a message. Clear as day I knew important things. This was my friend. He was hurting. Clear as day, “go to your friend.” I’m not affectionate, it’s hard for me, ask my wife. Beth knows that better than anyone. It’s not in my nature to want to go comfort and cry with a friend. That seems hard and vulnerable. But in that very important moment I know the Holy Ghost came to me and directed me. I know it was important for me, and I believe it was important for my friend. The Holy Ghost did that. I know that because I’ve worked so hard to be able to hear when the Holy Ghost speaks to me. I have so many examples of that. I could go on for days about the important moments that the Holy Ghost guided me.
After the Holy Ghost, the final step: endure to the end. Take the sacrament each week to renew your covenants from baptism. Repent every day. Remember Jesus Christ every day. That’s it. That brings you closer to God. I know because it has for me.
People don’t change overnight. I know to many it seemed like I changed overnight. I didn’t. It was years of slowly changing habits, changing thoughts. Many saw first-hand who I used to be but didn’t see the slow, gradual change to who I am now. I always told myself I was “good.” What good was me telling myself I was good if my actions and my selfishness said otherwise? Four years ago, if I received the text I mentioned above I would have said “I’m sorry” and “let me know if you need anything.” Today, I’m different. I’m different because of Jesus Christ.
What’s important? I know why I’m here. I know where I come from. I know where I’m going. This brings peace.
Quick update on my recovery. Nothing short of a miracle. The cover picture you’ve already seen is my head and arm today. It’s amazing. Read to the end to see the healing my head has gone through. Be warned, it is NOT pretty.
There has been real fear that I would have a permanent divot in my head. Like a mini crater. It was a likelihood that I would have a permanent bald spot. There were concerns about it healing and sealing up properly. There were many concerns.
I never concerned myself with much of this. It was something Beth and others would discuss. For one, I’m old, married, with a kid anyways. I always thought a bald spot would bother me. Once you get old, who really cares. Secondly, I didn’t concern myself with it because I knew it would work itself out.
Where I used to fear touching because there was a hole and I didn’t want to fully know what was going on back there, is now just a scab. Where we thought I might have a permanent crater and baldness, you can’t even tell there is an injury. My hair has grown long and now it blends in with the scab that has filled in my head.
There was some concern about how my arm might heal. I briefly had thoughts about whether the healing skin would tighten up and restrict movement. It’s my shooting shoulder! I set aside those concerns. It would heal or it wouldn’t. I wish I had the poetic ability to properly describe how it has transformed. From extremely painful, you’ve seen the pictures, to basically looking like a scratch. As of right now, it looks like I got a mild sunburn.
The third thing aside from my head and arm that was a concern was the helicopter bill. Our initial bill was for $46,198.50. You can imagine this would cause some amount of stress. I can say that Beth was pretty stressed about it. I say this with little pride, I like to think she was positively affected by my calm outlook. This is more due to our different demeanors than anything. It’s something I’ve written about before. Where Beth is pragmatic and planning, I like to think God will take care of it. See The Chance of Faith for more on that. God is likely more on Beth’s side. But I was not worried. We would have to pay it, or we wouldn’t. Either way, God was watching.
Despite my lack of worry and naïve, innocent belief that all would work out, I was still not looking forward to paying $46,000. For that reason, it was quite a relief when, after Beth’s work with forms and paperwork, our bill was dramatically decreased. I won’t give the exact amount, leave some intrigue, but I will say the decrease was ridiculous.
What’s the moral of the story?
I’m lucky?
Yes, I am.
I mentioned when I was on the ATV my brother gave me a priesthood blessing. I asked him 3 days after the accident what he said in the blessing. He replied that I was blessed that I would heal, and Beth wouldn’t lose me anytime soon. Again, my healing has been nothing short of miraculous. Anyone who has seen my head progress over the past 6 weeks is blown away. It’s unbelievable.
Am I lucky?
Yes, I am.
When I was 25 years old, I was ordained an Elder and given the Melchizedek Priesthood. I was so excited I invited every person I knew to be there. I was receiving the power and authority of God, to act in the name of Jesus Christ. I could heal, bless, baptize, and give the gift of the holy ghost. It was the most important moment in my life at that point.
Here is my testimony. The priesthood is the power and authority of God gifted to His children here on earth. When my brother laid his hands on my head and blessed me with health, it wasn’t the average prayer. The power that coursed from his hands to my bleeding head, the authority I myself had given him just months prior, that power literally healed me. That blessing was in affect and ordained by God. My brother worked hard to be worthy to bless me in that moment. That blessing came from heaven.
The priesthood authority is not mythical. It is not imaginary. It is a real power to act in God’s name. When I was blessed on that ATV, I was healed. I know it as sure as I am still breathing and typing this.
It’s a miracle how I’ve healed. I couldn’t heal like this without divine authority. I couldn’t heal like this unless God intended it to be. I was blessed by his power and authority. Why was I at peace throughout this process? Because 3 days in I asked my brother what he blessed me with that day. When he said, “you’ll heal,” I knew it would be. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind.
I can’t thank my Heavenly Father enough for what he has blessed me with. Last week I was able to bless my daughter with the same priesthood authority. I know the blessing I gave my daughter was ordained by God and will also be in full affect. I can’t thank God enough for the priesthood He has blessed me with. How it blesses my life and my family’s life every day.
I know that the authority to act in God’s name must come by the proper channels. I know that Joseph Smith was visited by Peter, James, and John and given the keys to this priesthood power. I know the Church of Jesus Christ was restored and we are blessed by His delegating those keys to us, to simple, flawed man. He has trusted us with power. I am grateful to Joseph Smith for restoring the priesthood power and authority. I’m grateful for every blessing I’ve received and given in my life.
I know that God has authorized this. I look forward to the day when I can kneel before him in humble amazement and ask how He could love us so much, that He would give us all He has.
This my testimony in the sacred name of Jesus Christ.
________________________________________
I will provide some picture evidence of the miraculous nature of my recover.
*****WARNING*****
Please don’t keep scrolling if you get queasy easily. These are pictures I refused to look at until today. You can call me a wimp, but I had to step outside for some fresh air after seeing them. You’ve been warned.
No Coincidences 