No Coincidences

Tag: Family

  • Leedy Wedding

    Leedy Wedding

    I wrote this at the hotel, a couple hours before officiating Matt Leedy and Sam Simpson’s wedding.

    It was such an honor being asked to do this.  For me, it’s a bit symbolic of how far I’ve come and transitioned from what I used to be.  When did I become the religious friend trusted to officiate a wedding?  I did this for my sister, but this will be the first real wedding I officiate.  My sister’s was more of a ring ceremony after their sealing in the temple.

    It is pretty cool to change to the point that people trust and ask you to play a part in what is one of the most sacred things. 

    At their wedding, before marrying them, I shared a three-minute thought.  In the moment, I didn’t use notes but rehearsed from memory.  But here is roughly what I shared at Matt and Sam’s wedding:

    “Matt and Sam, look out over all the faces here.  Take a moment, hold to this moment, remember this moment.  All these people are here to celebrate you, because they love you. 

    Something extra special is happening here today, though.  Nobody is here to celebrate you, Matt, or just you, Sam.  Some in the audience may even think they’re here for just one or the other, but that’s really not the case.  Every person here is to celebrate YOU, a unit, a new powerful team, one.  That is what makes this day so special.  Two people becoming one.

    On a day like today, we marvel at all the blessings we’ve been given.

    Remember who you just looked over.  Parents, grandparents, loved ones.  How blessed we are.  On a day like today, we also remember the ones we miss.  A grandma, a father, with a seat reserved.  It feels like yesterday that some loved ones had to leave us.  I think it feels like yesterday because something deep within us knows those loved ones never left us.

    I’m a firm believer in angels.  I’m a believer in angels that wouldn’t miss this day for the world.  So as you look out over those that you can see, I believe, there are some, many even, that are present that you can’t see.  Those loved ones that wouldn’t miss this.

    Matt’s father, Don, left us unexpectedly 18 months ago.  At that time, I got to witness something amazing happen.  I saw Sam love Matt.  I saw Sam protect Matt.  I saw Sam uplift Matt.  I saw Sam support Matt in the most difficult time in his life.  When life is the hardest, we find our foundations.  And when we find our foundation, or someone that does those things for us, it becomes our duty to love, support, uplift, and protect that person for the rest of our life.

    So, Matt, Sam, I encourage you to remember that the greatest challenges in life can result in the greatest blessings.  And with each other, as a unit, loving and supporting one another, you can get through anything this life tries to throw at you.

    We love you.  And we celebrate this day with you.”

    How grateful I am to have gotten to be a part of Matt and Sam’s day. 

    How grateful I am to feel worthy, and clean, to stand before God and a group of Matt and Sam’s loved ones and get to do that for them.

    How grateful I am for a Savior that allows me to be clean and feel worthy of that moment. 

    Thank you to Matt and Sam for trusting me and allowing me to be a part of something so important.

    We love you.

  • Grandma, I will see you soon

    Grandma, I will see you soon

    I believe Sandra Leach was in her early 30s when she accepted the message of the missionaries of Jesus Christ. I have thanked her for that choice every day of my entire life.

    I love you Grandma. Thank you.

    The greatest gift my grandmother gave me was the gift of a gospel household and a gift of the knowledge of the great Plan of Heavenly Father.  Why is this the greatest gift?  Death should hurt.  Because I know where my grandma is going and because I know I will see her again, death becomes less a sting of bitterness and more a quiet celebration.  I know who is greeting my grandmother, I know the peace and joy she will have as she waits for us to finish our race.  Especially when a good person passes, and there’s few better than my grandma, Sandra Leach, I know where she’s going is so marvelous and wonderful.  It will be sad for us who have to stay.

    It will be a brief stay away.

    I know that Grandma has a lot to do. I know that she’s working alongside Laura now.

    Soon, one day in the near future, when my race is hopefully won, I will meet her again.  We’ll sit in some glorious place I can’t describe; I don’t have the vocabulary or ability to imagine the setting of Heaven.  We will sit and we will go over every single book she read, that she passed to me, that I read.  The books will be in the hundreds!  The notes we’ll share!  I can’t wait.  We’ll have so much to discuss.  She’ll have so much more to teach me.  Just like she taught me here, she’ll teach me there.  I’ll thank her.  I imagine there are happy tears in Heaven.  I can already see and feel tears of joy pouring from my face as I thank her for leading me there.  I will thank her for her perseverance, effort, and determination to raise a righteous home.  I will thank her for teaching my mother about God, and Jesus Christ.  I will thank her for listening to the missionaries.  I will thank her for her faith.  I will thank her for the foundation she established so I could live a joyful life leading to the ultimate joy.  That moment with her and my loved ones.  Discussing our life past and the great future ahead.

    I long for eternity.  I know eternity is just on the other side of me closing my eyes for good from this existence.  I don’t long for death.  I’m not anxious to leave all I love here.  I am excited for my future of laying a foundation of love, faith, and obedience for my daughters.  I am excited for my time on this earth to do all the things my grandmother taught me were important.

    How can I ever thank my grandma for what she’s given me?  I can only give it to my daughters and all those around me.

    Thank you, Grandma.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart and soul.

    I don’t long for death, but I am excited for it.  I am excited for eternity with you.  I have no fear of death because I know it will be on God’s time and terms.  I know it will be for a purpose.  Death will only mean temporarily leaving others to reunite with family that has gone ahead.  How great it is to have no fear of death.  How great it is to know why I’m here. Thank you, Grandma, for that gift.

  • Watching Kids Grow

    Watching Kids Grow

    I know everyone with kids has experienced this, so I’ll try to do it some justice by putting it into words.

    Watching your kid(s) go from potato to living, breathing, functioning being is the most amazing, rewarding, spectacular thing.

    I once heard an interview with an extremely successful man.  Like – hundreds of millions, top of his field, successful.  He was asked, what would be your one regret?  His answer?  What could someone with so much success possibly regret?  He said he wished he had more kids.  I think this individual had 6 kids, but he said something that stood out to me.  He said something like, “I don’t think anyone gets older and says, ‘man, I had too many kids.’”  You’re much more likely to get older and say to yourself, “my kids are my complete joy, they are everything, I wish we had more.”

    I know that in the moment having children is so hard… so much work.  But I think I agree with that statement from that successful man.  I doubt when it’s all said and done I’ll say, “I really had too many kids.”

    Watching Ivy develop my habits, my vocabulary, and at the same time develop independence and become her own little person – it’s unbelievable.

    For anyone debating having children, I have one thing to say:  It will provide the greatest joy you could ever experience. I hope I’ve made that abundantly clear with my writing.

    I love Ivy and my family with all my heart.

    I didn’t plan on this.  I was actually writing this as its own post, not an announcement post.  But what better way to announce?

    Beth and I are expecting our second child.

    This brings stress, two children under the age of two.  Of course it brings stress.  But I know I’ll never regret it.  I can’t wait to welcome our new daughter.

    And Happy Mothers Day to the greatest partner.  Love you.

  • We’re Being Watched

    We’re Being Watched

    Beth just said something that gave me the heebie-jeebies, even though it’s something we already know, and unfortunately, are starting to accept.

    Beth said, “You know what I just realized?  Whenever we watch YouTube TV kids shows, all of the ads are super girly stuff.  They totally know we have a daughter.”

    They.

    Remember in the good old days when we would have conversations about skiing and then ski gear would show up as an ad on our phone/computer/device?  Do you remember when we transitioned from “wow that’s really weird…” to “are they listening to me?…” to “oh they’re listening good.”

    That last part came after it became public knowledge that our mics and search history and everything about us was being turned into marketing and advertisement data. 

    This will be a short post.  Re-read the end of The Social Dilemma where i discuss how to protect our families from becoming too attached to our devices. Also re-read The Social Dilemma part 2 and consider what we can do to protect ourselves and our families from advertisers. Be wary of what is happening to our children.  They are growing up in a world where MY TV knows I have a girl and is targeting her before she can even walk.  If that doesn’t scare you, at least a little bit, it should.

    Be cautious about what we expose our kids to.  Be cautious about what we post and share.  Protect them. 

    I know in this world it’s impossible for “them” to not know I have a daughter by now.  I know there’s only so much we can do.  But what I can try to control is how she is influenced by their advances.  I will do my best for my whole life to protect Ivy against targeted advertising and the influences of the media on her growing mind.

  • Thoughts on Beth’s Conversion Story

    Thoughts on Beth’s Conversion Story

    These are my thoughts on last week’s post, The Journal Entry of Beth’s Conversion Story. If you haven’t read that yet, read it first by clicking the link.

    “I wanted so badly to have the life I thought I knew we could have.  But we were sent here with free will and someone needs to want to change in order to truly change…”

    That statement hits hard.  To be clear with all reading: I have many similarities to Beth’s story.  I also have many similarities to her boyfriend John.  You can’t change until you’re ready to change.

    For anyone who knows my wife, her conversion story gives some perspective on why she is who she is.  We don’t become who we are by happenstance.  There are always experiences, moments, profound MOMENTS that shape us.  That is why we are here. After reading some of Beth’s story, and if you know her, you can start to see why she is caring, considerate, and loving to those around her. It is partly who she is and partly the experiences of her life that have changed her. I can relate. I used to be a self-absorbed punk. It took a lot of small steps to change who I once was.  Her words make me feel what I always know about my wife – she is special. 

    This is all I could picture as I read of Beth’s dream:

    And now this:

    God is great.

    I am lucky.  Beyond lucky.  What did I do to deserve so much?

    How could I think anything but how lucky I truly am as I read my wife’s testimony?  She is strong, and powerful, truly a queen, and we are one.

    As I read, I’m struck by the similarities in our stories.  The falling away, not knowing if / not wanting to come back, the prayer and feeling of atonement, dreams, pushes, promptings, coincidences.

    I’m brought to tears as I read my wife’s story.  All God did to bring us together can be read in between those lines.

    She wrote this April 20, 2016.  I came back to church, where I eventually met her, in March of 2016.  Coincidence?  Come on.